Category Archives: sex and sexuality

Women Want Casual Sex? Yes and No

Women want casual sex as much as men, says one study. No they don’t, says another.

Which is it?

Maybe you’ve heard of this project: strangers approach students on college campuses and propose a one night stand or a short-term fling. Women almost always decline, but a lot of men accept.

Standard conclusion: evidence supports evolutionary psychology which claims women are picky, wanting faithful men with good genes, who will provide for their children. Men, on the other hand, will have sex with as many women as possible to better “spread their seed.”

But wait. Another study found that women were as likely to accept casual offers as men. So long as the possible partners were Brad Pitt or Johnny Depp. Read the rest of this entry

Yo, Mama—These Jugs Make Milk!

By Elizabeth Hall Magill @ Yo, Mama

Breasts are fun.

They’re so fun that we’ve named them funbags, squeezeboxes, jugs, hooters, racks, boobs, and tits.

They’re fun to look at, fun to touch and squeeze. They bounce. Men like them, and that is a good thing.

Breasts can be fun to own.

They give a woman pleasure, and that is a good thing. They are an important part of a woman’s body—emblematic of her femininity, her sexuality. When a girl begins to develop breasts, it is her body’s way of saying she will one day be a woman, and a girl listens to that. She listens as the growing pains shoot through her chest, she listens as her mother and grandmother talk about finding a bra. Breasts are such an important part of the transition from girlhood to womanhood that we sometimes call them girls. Read the rest of this entry

Libido Killer: My Man Ogling Her

oglerYears ago I briefly dated a guy who ogled other women.

Ogle: To look at amorously, flirtatiously, or impertinently; to eye; look or stare at.

I “get” noticing and appreciating an attractive gal. But he dissolved into her. The many hers. While I faded away.

He thought I was weird: “Most girlfriends wouldn’t mind!”

But it was a huge turnoff. Read the rest of this entry

Chimp Study: Assault Aids Procreation?

Mean chimps

Mean chimps

Violence against women may aid procreation?

Some evolutionary psychologists actually think so.

After all, mean male chimps sire more offspring than their friendlier brothers, an Arizona State study findsRead the rest of this entry

How to Deal with Repression

shame2Repression is not what you might think it is. I recently wrote:

A lot of us think it’s about working to suppress sexual desire. And while the early stages can be at least partly conscious, after a while you’re not actively blocking anything. You’ve simply lost sexual feelings and energy. Plus, plenty of punishing messages targeted at women’s desire get internalized. And sex is too often used as a weapon. Read the rest of this entry

Man as Object: Reversing the Gaze

Della Calfee. Ass Like That

Della Calfee. Ass Like That

Men act and women appear. Men look at women. Women watch themselves being looked at.

That’s what art critic John Berger famously observed.

But some feminist artists have turned the tables in the exhibit, Man as Object: Reversing the Gaze:

With a gallery filled with men stripped naked this body of work exposes women’s cheeky, provocative and sometimes shocking commentaries on the opposite sex (which) may make the viewer squirm a little. But that is precisely the point.

Read the rest of this entry

A Sexy Halloween for Grade Schoolers?

Check out the change in Halloween costumes over the years. Girls are learning that a big part of their job is to look sexy. And they’re getting that message at a tender age.

Now that’s scary!

Then and now images, via Sociological Images:

Halloween Costumes, Then and Now 1 Read the rest of this entry

Repression: Not What You Think It Is

A culture of sexual repression

A culture of sexual repression

Misconceptions surround sexual repression. And both women and men can be confused.

Some women feel insulted if anyone suggests they might be repressed.

And conversations with guys have made me realize that plenty of them think that repression means, “I really want to have sex with you but I’m going to consciously repress the idea.”

Repression isn’t quite like that.  Read the rest of this entry

My Polyamory Journey

Polyamory 1By William Albert Baldwin

A few weeks ago, a woman invited me to her apartment, then proceeded to interview me for the role of her boyfriend/
lover/escort.

Since I write about polyamorous relationships and since I list myself as “in an open relationship” on Facebook, she figured I must be “available.”

Besides, I’m a guy; aren’t guys always ready for a willing woman?

In short: No. Read the rest of this entry

My Bumpy Trek: From Tomboy to Sex Object to Me

Bullying pretty girls

Bullying pretty girls

By KEG

As a little girl I wanted to be a boy. As a teen I wanted to be a Cosmo Girl.

I got punished either way.

Sometimes so badly that I stopped eating and started hiding and cutting.

Many scrapes and bruises later, I’m glad to be me. Read the rest of this entry