Category Archives: women
Do women worry about “doing it right?”
Women concerned with pleasing partners
I asked women and men in my classes if they ever worry about whether they are “doing it right” when they have sex.
I recently wrote up my survey of young college men. Now let’s turn to the women, all of whom are 1st and 2nd year students, and almost all are in their late teens/early twenties.
I asked 80 of my women students who had sex with men (straight/bi/pan/flex) this question:
In sexual situations do you ever worry about whether you are “doing it” right?
Answer: YES: 73% NO: 27%
Their answers were similar to the men’s. Most students did worry, at least sometimes, with 73% of women and 71% of men saying they did.
Next, I did a qualitative survey of 52 women, asking them to talk more about their answer. (Among this sub-group 71% worried about “doing it right.”)
While the women and men I surveyed were about equally likely to worry, the women sometimes described their concern a little differently from the men. Read the rest of this entry
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Seeking Men For Self-Esteem
By Maria Infante
For as long as I can remember I looked to men for approval.
Why? Maybe it was my absent father who was only around for dinner and bed. He paid the rent but didn’t show me much interest. And he favored cousin Daniel over me.
So I made it my mission to become his favorite child. Read the rest of this entry
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I Look Sexy, But I Don’t Feel Pleasure
Laci Green explains self objectification.
I recently talked about “spectatoring” — watching yourself have sex instead of enjoying pleasure.
After surveying my women students I learned that three-quarters spent at least some of their time in bed distracted by how they looked. Most worried that they weren’t “hot” enough. And most also said that their concerns harmed their sexual experience to some degree.
But some women did think they were attractive. In fact, when I surveyed students about the last time they had sex, one young woman replied, “I think I looked pretty good.” Read the rest of this entry
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Men Upset About Treatment? Turn It Around.
Many people are more offended at calling out sexism than being sexist.
A lot of guys are angry at so-called reverse racism and reverse sexism.
So I tried imagining the world turned around. Read the rest of this entry
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Women-Parts As Urinals
Sociological Images has quite a collection of women-parts as urinals, and sometimes sinks.
Looks like equal parts sex and denigration of women.
From Stephanie Medley-Rath: urinals shaped like women’s mouths (source)
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Women Want Emotionally Connected Sex. Why?
Women want emotionally connected sex.
Not all women, all the time.
But University of Texas psychologists, Cindy Meston and David Buss interviewed over 1,000 women around the world for their book, Why Women Have Sex, and here’s what they found: Read the rest of this entry
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Stirring Up Feminazis
What’s the difference between being powerful and merely feeling powerful?
Too often people chase the feeling and give up the real thing.
I sense the phenomenon when frat boys try to feel powerful by intimidating women.
Or when feminists are called “feminazis.” Read the rest of this entry
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Seeing My Male Privilege
Male privilege
By Jonathan Castellanos
I’ve often thought how nice it must be to be white.
Popular, attractive, upper class: these are words I’ve come to associate with whiteness.
But until recently I hadn’t given much thought to privileges I gain from being male. Read the rest of this entry
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Anyone Crave The Male Gaze?
Ogle: to gaze with sexual desire.
When it comes to feelings about this sort of gaze, women aren’t all of a kind.
I surveyed 44 of my women students for their thoughts. Read the rest of this entry
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Women = Natural Nurturers = Less $, Status and Power
Nurturing dad.
Girls are naturally more nurturing than boys, right?
A lot of people think so.
Some scientists think it’s because testosterone blocks male nurturing instincts.
Incidentally, this notion conveniently brings men more money, status and power.
Because if women are natural nurturers then — naturally — they should stay home with children. And keep out of arenas that bestow money, status and power.
What’s the scientific evidence? Read the rest of this entry
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