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Why Do Women Prioritize Men’s Pleasure?

Only want to please your man?

Only want to please your man?

A lot of women prioritize men’s pleasure over their own.

Instead of focusing on her own pleasure a woman may worry about whether she’s attractive enough. Or she may agree to do things she doesn’t like. Or she may give him a blowjob in his dorm room, or the backseat of his car, without expecting anything in return.

But why is that? Read the rest of this entry

Women’s Sexuality in Islam

IslamBy Dania Jafar

Islam represses women’s sexuality, right? Think again.

We all see Muslim women draped in head-to-toe burqas. Or read about 10-year-olds being married off to 50-year-old men. Or cringe at women being stoned for adultery. Or knifed to death by family members in “honor killings” for such crimes as fornication or being with a man without a chaperone – or for being raped. (The stain of sexual impurity must be removed from the family, it is thought.) In some parts of North Africa and the Middle East women’s genitals are ritually cut or removed in the name of Islam.

In such a world, whose sexuality wouldn’t be repressed?

But nothing you just read has anything to do with Islam. All of the above are cultural practices that are not approved in the Quran. Read the rest of this entry

Women Are More Responsive To Repression

OPINIONS_slut_martin_original_original_original_mediumWomen’s sexuality is more hushed-up and punished in our culture:

  • Sexual women are still called “sluts” and “ho’s”
  • Parents — especially fathers — are more open about sexuality with their sons. In fact, dad may brag about his son’s sexual prowess but not his daughter’s
  • Viagra is openly advertised but products aiding women’s sexuality are not
  • Ever seen a movie about girls trying to lose their virginity?
  • The fear of sexual violence — or actually experiencing it — makes sexuality seem fearful to women and girls
  • And be careful girls, or you may get f’d or screwed

AND women’s sexuality is more responsive to punishment.

Why? Read the rest of this entry

Religion Shutting Down Sexuality

Religious sexual repression

Religious sexual repression

Harmful messages about sexuality are too often transmitted by conservative religions of all stripes.

The Christian woman quoted below is talking about how much she shares with another Christian woman’s experience:

“I suppressed most of my sexual urges.” YES. Hell yes, I did. “I was more or less asexual.” YES. I didn’t have a sexual thought, didn’t have a sexual fantasy, didn’t have a sex drive. I’d suppressed these things out of existence. Read the rest of this entry

What Does “Sex-Positive” Mean?

sex positive

The sex-positive movement

Some fear that if we create a more sex-positive society — meaning that we stop repressing women’s sexuality — that NO ONE will put on the BRAKES! And society will go mad.

Complete chaos!

So what do I mean by “sex-positive”? Read the rest of this entry

Sex-Negative Societies & Non-Orgasmic Women

sex-negativeSex-positive societies create easily orgasmic, and multiply orgasmic women.

So it’s no surprise that sex-negative societies do the opposite.

In some places women’s pleasure is deliberately cut by damaging or removing the clitoris. In other places something more akin to a psychological clitoridectomy is performed. Let’s take a look at how that can happen. Read the rest of this entry

Repression Shutting Down Sexuality

Sexual repression 2Repressive forces can shut down sexuality.

But how?

I’ll start with my own experience.  Read the rest of this entry

Who Has a Higher Sex Drive?

While some women want more sex than their partners, generally the pattern goes the other way.

Why?

Researchers at Indiana University say, Read the rest of this entry

Women’s Lower Sex Drive Isn’t A Problem?

headacheResearch consistently shows that women have a lower sex drive than men.

But maybe it’s not a problem?

While 44% of US women report sexual problems, most commonly low desire, only 12% are bothered by it.

If you don’t care, what’s the problem? Read the rest of this entry

Repression: Not What You Think It Is

A culture of sexual repression

A culture of sexual repression

Misconceptions surround sexual repression. And both women and men can be confused.

Some women feel insulted if anyone suggests they might be repressed.

And conversations with guys have made me realize that plenty of them think that repression means, “I really want to have sex with you but I’m going to consciously repress the idea.”

Repression isn’t quite like that.  Read the rest of this entry

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