RoSo’s Story of Sex-Positivity

Editors note: I’m trying to learn why some women are more sex-positive than others. So I asked my students, if they were interested, to tell me stories of their backgrounds. 

So far I have found a few things that distinguish women who experience more sex-negativity and sexual dysfunction. They — and in my youth I would count myself among them — are more likely to:

  • Worry that God will punish them for their sexuality 
  • Have sex-negative parents
  • Have sex-negative friends
  • If they are slut-shamed by their peers they feel deeply “wrong” and shameful
  • They refrain from learning about their sexuality and what works for them

RoSo is a straight 24-year-old woman of East Asian descent. Here is her story: Read the rest of this entry

How to Find Love After Divorce [9 Tips]

Finding love

By Christian Denmon

Ending a marriage is the most difficult period in an individual’s life. Finding love again for the second time can be more complex than the first time. Just like death, divorce requires grieving the loss of a loved one, before we begin dating again. Skipping this crucial process may bring complications when a divorced couple tries to get back into the dating scene again.

It’s important to find some quiet time in solitude to comprehend the breakup regardless of who initiated it. Perfect activities to keep the mind off the loss cycle include: Read the rest of this entry

Ecofeminism: Why We Need It

Ecofeminism: Why We Need It.

By Marian Avila-Breach

What is ecofeminism?

Throughout the history of feminism, feminist theory has always been shaped by women’s lives around the world. Feminism and all theories that purport equality, look at the world and its governments and institutions and attempt to look further and look at how the world should be. Recently, with the women’s march in March and the scourge of sexual harassers in media and politics, the fight for women’s rights has risen another notch. Women are demanding an equal world. However, as women’s rights achieve progress, new legislation in the US breaks down environmental protection laws and deregulates environmentally harmful practices. What use are equal rights if there is no longer a healthy Earth in which to practice them? French feminist Françoise d’Eaubonne coined the term Ecofeminism in the 1970’s as a way to bring attention to the ways women and feminist theory could bring about an ecological revolution. Like feminist theory itself, ecofeminism is comprised of a rich diversity of sub-theories, many linked to other philosophies of government or economy. A broad definition of ecofeminism, however, would be the overarching idea of there being diverse interconnections between women, the fight for women’s rights, and environmental protection. Read the rest of this entry

#Metoo: My Story Of Recovery

By R.G.

Seven years ago I was sexually assaulted.

I don’t owe anyone a story and I still have difficulty assessing what happened.

My story is not sensational. It did not make headlines. But yes, it happened and it is important to share.

I was in an emotionally manipulative and sexually abusive relationship. I waited and waited for his affirmation of what happened in order to validate my experience, but it never seemed to come.  Read the rest of this entry

Guys, Girls Swap Roles at a Bar

Men ordering Raspberry Kamikazes at a bar as women make passes — and get shut down? This bit of videoed role swapping went viral.

The reel holds stereotypes but even they can contain kernels of truth. And anything that moves us out of our taken-for-granted ways sheds light. Read the rest of this entry

Women Looking at David Beckham Showing Skin

David Beckham

Since women were so uncomfortable with the male stripper image I discussed last time I thought I’d try a more masculine image with a bit more clothing.

David Beckham is a conventionally attractive man who looks masculine and is known for his prowess in football (soccer to us Americans). And this type of photo (men’s underwear ads) occurs more often than others I’d shown my classes. Does that make a difference? Read the rest of this entry

How Does A Man Ask A Woman Out Post-Weinstein?

Sexual harassment is finally coming out of the closet.

One of my male Facebook friends wondered: how does a man ask a woman out post-Weinstein?

He’s not the only one who wonders. A New York Times headline blared “Deep Confusion of the Post-Weinstein Moment.”  Read the rest of this entry

Women Looking at Magic Mike Stripper

Magic Mike Strippers

Magic Mike Strippers

How do women feel about pictures of men showing a lot of skin?

A few years back I surveyed students on a picture of Sly Stallone. You can see my writeup here. In brief: There was a mix of appreciation and discomfort.

He’s attractive and sexy. “He’s sexy, but” (He’s not my type… I don’t want to have sex with him…) He’s not attractive … it’s weird.

Some suggested I update the survey to include current stars like Channing Tatum, once named People’s sexiest man alive. So I asked 133 of my women students to write whatever thoughts came to them when looking at the picture below:  Read the rest of this entry

Men Looking at Men Showing Skin

A while back I surveyed my straight male students on their thoughts when looking at a nude-ish picture of Sly Stallone.

Had attitudes changed since sociologist, Beth Eck, found that straight guys were pretty uncomfortable looking at that picture almost 15 years ago?

I asked them to write whatever thoughts came to mind and then I analyzed and published the results here.

But blog readers wondered what men would think if I used a more current star. So I surveyed 40 of my male students. Here’s a comparison of Sly Stallone, Channing Tatum and David Beckham. Read the rest of this entry

The Rapist In Our Minds

Rose McGowanYou’ve probably heard Rose McGowan’s powerful speech to The Women’s Convention of Detroit, which included these words:

Hollywood may seem like it’s an isolated thing, but it is not. It is the messaging system for your mind. It is the mirror that you’re given to look into…

[Movies are] told through 96 percent males in the Directors’ Guild of America… We are given one view. And I know the men behind that view. And they should not be in your mind and they should not be in my mind. It’s time to clean house.

This comes in response to accusations of sexual abuse by Hollywood producer, Harvey Weinstein, and others.

Media reflects and reinforces culture

Media reflects, reinforces, and helps to create the larger culture. Read the rest of this entry

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