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Do women worry about “doing it right?”

Men concerned with pleasing partners

Women concerned with pleasing partners

I asked women and men in my classes if they ever worry about whether they are “doing it right” when they have sex.

I recently wrote up my survey of young college men. Now let’s turn to the women, all of whom are 1st and 2nd year students, and almost all are in their late teens/early twenties.

I asked 80 of my women students who had sex with men (straight/bi/pan/flex) this question:

In sexual situations do you ever worry about whether you are “doing it” right?

Answer: YES: 73%            NO: 27%

Their answers were similar to the men’s. Most students did worry, at least sometimes, with 73% of women and 71% of men saying they did.

Next, I did a qualitative survey of 52 women, asking them to talk more about their answer. (Among this sub-group 71% worried about “doing it right.”)

While the women and men I surveyed were about equally likely to worry, the women sometimes described their concern a little differently from the men. Read the rest of this entry

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