Category Archives: sex and sexuality
Men v Women: How Flexible Is Orientation?
Women’s sexual orientation is more fluid than men’s, says University of Utah professor, Lisa Diamond. Well, women have a basic orientation, she says, but it seems to be a bit easier for women to crossover. For both cultural and biological reasons.
Research from the University of Montréal seems to bear that out. The study had simply looked at how common different sex fantasies were. But comparing men and women, you see more fluidity among females. Read the rest of this entry
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Cross-Dressing’s Erotic Side
Grayson Perry, in drag
Being a transvestite is a complex cocktail of motivations. It’s different for everyone, but there’s often a strong sexual component to cross-dressing, although trannies sometimes find it hard to admit this. I feel it’s like the elephant in the room. I feel it’s really there, but nobody’s talking about it.
Maybe it’s this erotic dimension which is the hardest part for others to accept.
That’s what artist and cross-dresser, Grayson Perry thinks.
“Vivienne,” over at Bluestocking Blue began blogging to better understand why “she” feels compelled to cross-dress male-to-female. Read the rest of this entry
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Handholding, Hand Jobs, and Intimacy
I recently admitted my surprise that some people find handholding more intimate than a hand job.
And I admitted that, for me, the “aloof intimacy” of non-emotional sex ranges from unappealing to disturbing.
And then I asked people who saw things differently — both on my blog and among my friends — to tell me how they felt.
Here’s what they said — plus a few more thoughts: Read the rest of this entry
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Do Men & Women Have Wild or Romantic Fantasies?
Romantic fantasies are popular for both men and women.
Whose fantasies are more romantic? Women’s or men’s?
Who is more likely to fantasize about sex with strangers?
Or multiple partners?
Or simply someone who isn’t your spouse? Read the rest of this entry
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Objectifying Women Objectifies Men
Norah Vincent transforms into a man (“Ned”) for 18 months.
The four Fs. That’s all you need to know about women. Find ‘em. Feel ‘em. F- ‘em. Forget ‘em.
The only time 12-year-old Phil had a man-to-man chat with his dad, he got that advice. By the time he was a married 39-year-old professional with two daughters, he seemed to have absorbed the lesson: Read the rest of this entry
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The Breast Fetish Is Natural? Afraid Not.
Got milk?
Science has shown that human females develop breasts as a secondary sexual characteristic that signals a woman is of age to reproduce. Breasts in other mammals only enlarge with pregnancy. And, female nipple stimulation lights up the same area of the brain as clitoral stimulation.
Comments like that come in response to this post: Men Aren’t Hard Wired To Find Breasts Attractive.
There, I argue that the breast fetish is socially constructed, and not biologically-based. Some readers tell me I’m wrong.
Here are their thoughts, and mine: Read the rest of this entry
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When Porn Makes Your Decisions
Hooked on porn
Pornographic images seem to activate a man’s visual system in a manner that goes beyond just looking at trees or even people. It’s almost like a high-definition signal compared with a standard signal.
That’s from William Struthers, Ph.D., a biopsychologist who wrote Wired for Intimacy.
He says the signal feels a lot like a drug. Some men call porn a “drug” and say it gives them a “rush” and makes them “high.” One man called it, “More mind altering than alcohol or any drug I’ve used.” Read the rest of this entry
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Men & Women React to Male & Female Nudity
Women and men showing skin
By Lisa Wade @ Sociological Images
We’ve all heard the truism “sex sells.”
But whose sex is sold? And to who?
If it was simply that sex sold,
…we’d see men and women equally sexually objectified in popular culture. Instead, we see, primarily, women sold to (presumably heterosexual) men. So what are we selling, exactly, if not “sex”?
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Hand-Holding: More Intimate Than Sex?
Which is more intimate? Handholding or a hand job?
A young woman attending a college workshop on sexual assault was shocked to hear men say they thought handholding was more intimate than sex.
After all, they held hands with women they cared about. They could get a hand job — or even intercourse — from any old hookup.
Well, I’m perplexed, too. Read the rest of this entry
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Nice Guys Are A Turnoff?
Feminist Ryan Gosling
A lot of guys complain that being nice kills off the feminine libido.
But that doesn’t make sense to me because I’m only attracted to nice guys. So are my friends.
And plenty of women are attracted to these nice guys: Read the rest of this entry
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