Women and Gay, Hot Bods

Why do (some) women watch gay porn?

Why do (some) women watch gay porn?

Why do women — especially lesbians — watch gay porn?

Well, not all women – probably a minority of them. But still.

I recently wrote that gay porn stars seem to have more fun than their straight female counterparts.

But gay porn stars are also HOT.

And how much of the allure comes from spotlighting — shall we say — a certain part of the male physique?

Gay porn stars are hot

We don’t fetishize men’s bodies and their parts — at least not outside gay sub-culture — so it’s no wonder that women are much less likely than men to watch porn. But even if men’s body parts rarely spark arousal, hot men can sure spark desire.

One of my male commenters, Bob, guessed that,

The “eye candy” element — with the attractive male bodies — that adds to it, even if their bodies don’t cause arousal by themselves.

Ginger Murray, over at SFWeekly, thinks so:

A lot of women also like gay male porn purely because we are turned on by hot men. In gay porn, there are all sorts of types to satisfy any taste. Pretty boys, buff boys, leather daddies, and all kinds of other man flavors are boldly laid out for us to enjoy.

Another put it this way,

There’s nothing better than watching two handsome guys f******

How about that phallus?

Women who watch gay porn rarely say that the penis is a turn on. But like I said, our society does not fetishize male body parts so that’s no surprise. And most women don’t seem to be at all interested in looking at them.

Yet some do seem drawn to gay porn because of both hot guys and their cocks. Like the appropriately-named erotica author, Kristi Hancock:

I like that the porn is penis-focused. That’s where the hot guys are.”

Her comment’s a little confusing. She likes the penis-focus BECAUSE, “That’s where the hot guys are”? Still, some women may learn to fetishize the phallus — even if the culture doesn’t — through porn exposure or by associating it with orgasm. (Only about one quarter of women consistently experience orgasm via PIV. Most women climax better via outercourse than intercourse.)

For others, the phallus is a turn on because of what it means: desire. That’s a point that Julianne Moore’s lesbian character makes in the movie, The Kids Are All Right.

Or as lesbian comedienne Judy Gold put it,

I have no sexual attraction to men, but I think there’s something about seeing a penis become erect that’s a turn-on for lesbians. Because what are you going to do with a woman? Get a telescope and a sponge and a paper towel?”

Some men don’t like the fact that few women find the penis visually arousing — and hope it isn’t so. But it could be a blessing in disguise. If women got aroused by penises then guys would end up more worried about them — how they look… if they’re adequate…

As it is, a lot of guys worry unnecessarily. Like I said, only a quarter of women orgasm through intercourse, and for them penis size doesn’t seem to matter.

This is part 2 of a series asking the question: Why do women watch gay porn?

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About BroadBlogs

I have a Ph.D. from UCLA in sociology (emphasis: gender, social psych). I currently teach sociology and women's studies at Foothill College in Los Altos Hills, CA. I have also lectured at San Jose State. And I have blogged for Feminispire, Ms. Magazine, The Good Men Project and Daily Kos. Also been picked up by The Alternet.

Posted on August 10, 2015, in men, pornography, psychology, sex and sexuality, women and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 17 Comments.

  1. I have to admit I’m one of those women! LMAO

    Hell, I don’t really know why but gay porn is a turn on. I know what your thinking….I’m weird, right? Lol Come on admit it? This post was extremely entertaining. Hope your having a great day. Hugs Paula xxx

  2. I think that hot male bodies and phalus focus porn are two different things.

    I have a couple of questions regarding women’s visual attraction to men
    Do (most) women notice hot attractive guys in real life or are they indifferent?
    Would (most) women have the desire to have sex with a hot attractive guy or would they be indifferent

    • Yes, they are definitely two different things.

      I’m pretty sure that most women notice hot, attractive guys in real life. Not with a fetish response, but with great appreciation, shall we say.

      Your last question is more complicated. Sure. But at the same time it’s common for women to want to have sex with someone she’s emotionally connected with. That might have something to do with the punishment women receive for their sexuality, which can cause general desire to dampen or to simply be afraid of slut-shaming. Or to have personal fears for her safety.

  3. There are other things in life more important than sex….and, if given enough time, I’m sure I could think of what some of them they are.

  4. This is quite an interesting fact. Personally, I don’t like watching gay-porns much… I mean..they are okay type… 😀

  5. I’ll tell you why I like Yaoi, which may be different from Western gay porn. (Keep in mind, most of Yaoi is mostly story-telling, but of course, it ends with nice sex. Think of it as a nice romantic movie with a raunchy finish scene. )

    (1.) I love the bottoms. The uke/submissive/receptive partner is in so much pleasure, he moans and screams. Theres nothing like seeing a guy get off like that. Its just…so…

    Vulnerable. That really gets me off. The guy under, is so bare, so willing to relinquish power. He sheds the mask of macho-ness and experiences the powerful tides of pleasure that women are usually depicted as experiencing. There is so much beauty in that.

    (2.) There is greater empathy between two men, than with a man and a woman. A greater connection. Whatever said and done, there will always be ‘that barrier’ when it comes to a man and a woman.They are ‘fundamentally different/differently wired’.

    (3.) It throws out of the loop gender roles and stereotypes. No oppressive roles, no sexist expectations. Just two human beings making love.

    • Someone else was wondering why some women enjoy reading gay romance. Yaoi is different because it is also visual, and has some action. But I could see how this relates to gay porn, As well. Yaoi sounds like gay porn meets romance.

      So by “bottoms” I think you mean the person in the submissive position, as opposed to the physical part of the body — based on the context you give.

      In terms of the distance you talk about, between the sexes, I don’t believe that it’s hardwiring so much as gender construction. And one thing you find with gay men is that they don’t feel like they have to keep the distance that straight men often do. So that might be what you’re saying there.

      It’s common for straight men to feel like they have to wear a mask of invulnerability and independence. Since gay man are already defined as “Not real men” there is no reason for them to maintain that mask.

      In relationships straight men walked and let down their mask and be super connected. I’ve been in relationships with a couple men with an amazing amount of connection, so I know that they can do it they feel safe enough to let down the mask. And it’s amazing when that happens. By far the best relationship.

      Thanks so much for your thoughts. I do believe it has sparked a blog post idea, And I will quote you.

      • Haha, ‘yaoi = gay porn meets romance’ is so true ! And yes I mean submissive, as opposed to the physical positions. But usually in Yaoi, the two are synonymous. (a sad stereotype)

        What you say about the ‘connection’ really touched me. I’d really love to find such meaningful romantic relationships irrespective of gender, but it is so hard, when society keeps telling you that we are ‘fundamentally different’/men will be men/everyone just wants to bang you.

        I suppose thats one more reason I like gay porn and gay men in general. There is a stereotype about them being sensitive/empathetic/connected for reasons you stated above. So I’m attracted to gay men, which is paradoxical as I’m attracted to someone who cannot be attracted to me. To escape this, I like to fantasize about being a man and making love to a gay man. The win-win fantasy.

        I can’t wait to read what you have in mind 🙂

      • What you say is so interesting. May have to use it in a future post if you don’t mind.

        Maybe these posts will give you some hope about straight guys:

        How Guys Think About Sex & Dating
        https://broadblogs.com/2014/01/06/how-guys-think-about-sex-dating/
        Guys Are Getting More Romantic
        https://broadblogs.com/2012/06/11/guys-are-getting-more-romantic/
        Guys: Romantic? Or Just Want One Thing?
        https://broadblogs.com/2013/09/16/guys-romantic-or-just-want-one-thing/

  6. Thanks for the links. And no problem, I don’t mind 🙂

  7. I like the point of view you made in the post, but still not everybody has same reaction. In my case, the times that I watch gay porn is because I can see what straight guys hate. Is more taboo in the way that is less acceptable than lesbian porn. And from what porn videos project to their audience is a fake or imaginative sex. It reminded me of the movie Don John, the guy obsessed with porn. But when he actually had sex, he got disappointed because it wasn’t like in the porn videos he saw. On the other hand, I feel that gay porn is more close to real sex, than the other porn videos, either heterosexual or homosexual.

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