Category Archives: feminism
Don’t Be Kind To Everyone
By Sandra Arias
What did your parents teach you that you won’t teach your kids?
A young woman answered, “My parents always told me to be kind to everyone. I won’t teach my children that. It’s not always good to be kind to everyone.”
She was so young, but she knew this. Why did it take me so long to learn?
That’s from Debra Anna Davis’ piece, “Betrayed by the Angel.”
It takes me back to a time when I too was young, shy, and intimidated by boys. I didn’t know why I was a target. I was polite, spoke when spoken to, and never caused a scene. I thought being a good girl would keep problems at bay. But it made me weak.
I am a different person today.
If only I had known then what I know now. Read the rest of this entry
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Under Patriarchy Women Can’t Eat
By Victoria King
Under patriarchy women may not be allowed to vote or hold public office, own property, or make choices that stray from their husbands’ inclinations. In the modern Western world we don’t have those problems anymore. But in modern patriarchy we can’t eat. Well, we can eat a little. But not too much. The current ideal that is slapped all over billboards and fashion mags is thinner than is healthy. Read the rest of this entry
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Porn: Making Men Want What Women Don’t
Did the porn industry figure out that by creating male yearnings for things women don’t like, they could make more money?
Sometimes it seems like it.
It would make sense: If porn is the only place guys can get a lot of what they want, you keep ‘em coming back for more.
Sure, some women are up for pornified sex, whether enthusiastically or not. But an awful lot aren’t.
Dr. Robert Jensen, a University of Texas professor and feminist who lectures on pornography says women constantly ask him what they should do when their partners want things they find upsetting.
And I’ve given my students surveys to compare women’s and men’s sexual preferences. Here’s a small sampling of what I’ve found (more later!): Read the rest of this entry
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Fantasizing About New Men
Walk a mile in her shoes
by Donna Decker @ Ms Magazine
Dear Men:
Here is a new kind of fantasy. It is about a new kind of man.
These men are born on the campus of an Ivy League college in New England. Or at a West Coast university. Or maybe at a football-happy school on the Great Plains.
These men talk to each other. They order pizza, play fantasy football, share their feelings and do not make fun of each other for this. Mostly, they talk about the men who behave badly, who rape the women on campus, who threaten the women in online blog posts by creating a “rape guide” instructing other men how to rape specific women.
These New Men are, quite frankly, appalled. When the women activists on campus are shouting, demanding justice, they stand among them. They shout. They, too, demand justice. Read the rest of this entry
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My Experience with Sexual Assault: The Epitome of Common
By Alexandra Greene
I have been sexually assaulted three times in my life.
I am sharing my story not because it is fun, but because it is the epitome of common. I hope to help others who have been hurt, and who might be at risk for further harm.
Around age seven, fresh off the tails of my parents’ messy divorce, I became close friends with a neighborhood girl just a few years my senior. I was vulnerable and in need of guidance. Over the next six years I hung on her every word, and believed she wanted the best for me. Read the rest of this entry
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Mammary Glands Deserve Respect – Along With The Rest Of Us
Julia Cahill, “Breasts in the Press”
My mammary glands are complex and they deserve respect.
So says artist, Julia Cahill. “Breasts in the Press” is her commentary on their over-sexualized media image. And what better musical accompaniment than her rewrite of the black-eyed peas, “My Humps,” she adds?
Too often over-sexualization leads women and girls to become victims. Kelly Blevins’ “Ghosts” takes us there. Describing her painting she explains, “The hand of a ghost across the neck represents physical, mental and emotional abuse and how it becomes a permanent imprint in us.”
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Do Women Objectify Men?
Men in thongs
When I talk about objectification, every now and then someone — it may be either a man or a woman — protests that:
- Women do it too!
- Women check out men!
- Playgirl exists!
- Young girls love teeny-bopper Tiger Beat
- Etc.
Do women objectify men? Read the rest of this entry
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Gender MashUp at Anime Conventions
By Demon Ted
Wanna see a gender-bending mashup? The world turned round? Or at least halfway around? Then check out an Anime Convention.
Anime is Japanese cartooning — a stylized way of drawing that appeals to every gender. At the conventions fans dress as their favorite characters. It’s called “cosplay” from costume + play.
The conventions are remarkably egalitarian, and possibly tilting toward matriarchy.
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Girls Hit On Guys Like (Some) Guys Hit On Girls
Luckily, most men already know that when approaching a woman you’re interested in, the best move does not involve leering, catcalling, groping or acting the know-it-all.
Here’s a video for those who don’t. Reversing sexual come-ons:
Also, The Guardian’s Leah Green reverses gender roles in London. Each gender-flipping encounter is based on real experiences women have tweeted about on @EverydaySexism, a project chronicling women’s everyday encounters with sexism. Read the rest of this entry
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She Doesn’t Want To “Do it”
Some guys complain that women won’t do things that men want, sexually. Or worse, they aren’t into sex, at all.
They grumble after I’ve written something like this:
A woman explains, “A lot of guys have come to expect the ‘Porn-Star Experience’ … A few women might enjoy it, but for most it’s harrowing.”
Or, Read the rest of this entry
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