Toxic Masculinity = Masculinity?
Reader comments inspired this blog post which I published on Good Men Project:
Why do so many men insist that masculinity is the same thing as toxic masculinity — the violent, aggressive variant that leads to horrors like rape or beatings or terrorism (domestic and foreign)? I wondered about this while talking with some non-feminist acquaintances — I try to reach beyond my feminist choir on a regular basis.
We had gotten onto the subject of the tweetstorm created by Danielle Muscato’s question, “What would you do if all men had a 9 pm curfew?”
The men I spoke with were infuriated, taking the proposal literally and not as a thought experiment. “That would be a human rights violation,” said one. “Women would have nothing to do since most businesses would close at 9 PM,” said another.
Read more@ Good Men Project.
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Virgins and Cults and Morals, Oh My!
How does one lose virginity?
By Kyle Welsh
Virginity, or the lack thereof, plays a big role in how we treat women.
From religious practices to traditional lifestyles, high value is placed on women who have never had sex.
In The Cult of Virginity Jessica Valenti talks about the “virginity mystery” – that is, the realization that there is no medical or social definition for what a virgin actually is. Read the rest of this entry
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9 PM Curfew For Toxic Masculinity
Israeli Prime Minister Golda Meir on curfews for men.
Years ago when Israel faced a rape epidemic someone suggested putting women under curfew until the country was safe again.
Prime Minister Golda Meir thought better: Men are committing the rapes. Let them be put under curfew.
I thought of that when Danielle Muscato wondered on Twitter,
What would you do if all men had a 9 pm curfew? Read the rest of this entry
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Pro-Sex Assault, Anti-Condom, Anti-Abortion
Trump and Kavanaugh
Contradiction abounds among too many Republican leaders of the male persuasion.
These men are anti-abortion yet fight against contraception — the most effective means of preventing one.
Or they are anti-abortion until they want their partners to get one.
Or they engage in sexual assault even while acting to prevent women and girls from accessing abortion should they be impregnated by such a horrifying act.
It all sounds contradictory. But patriarchy ties it all altogether. Read the rest of this entry
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Bucket Lists and F*ck It Lists
Casual sex can block you from finding meaningful sex. Do you agree or disagree?
By Pamela Robinson
The internet has “disrupted” courting.
Couples sit side by side, not talking, computers or phones on their laps.
The events of courting, including breaking up, are delivered via text message.
Pornography in all forms is easy to access on the Internet.
How will relationships survive through the twenty-first century? Read the rest of this entry
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Her Defense: I Had No Desire
Her desire is offensive and shamed. His is celebrated.
Why are girls still shamed for being sexually assaulted?
And why is lacking sexual desire still seen as good… a good girl?
In a double standard that does not hold for men? Read the rest of this entry
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Where Are The Girls? The Small Children? The Babies?
Tough Guise
Donald Trump’s policy of separating immigrant children from their parents after crossing into the United States has left people worried about the health and well-being of those kids.
We have now seen pictures of older boys. But where are the girls? Where are the tender-aged children? Where are the babies?
One journalist’s visit to a boys’ compound may offer a clue as to why everyone but older boys are kept out of sight. Read the rest of this entry
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Sexy Women Make Men Feel Bad About Themselves
Brooklyn Decker
By “Bob”
Sexy models like Brooklyn Decker can make women to feel bad about themselves when women feel like they don’t measure up.
But men can feel bad about themselves when they look at Brooklyn, too. Read the rest of this entry
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Can We Redistribute Sex Like We Redistribute Wealth?
Redistributing wealth from the middle class to the top 1%.
Can we redistribute sex the way we redistribute wealth?
George Mason economist and libertarian Robin Hanson seems to think so.
He proposed that men should start threatening women with violence if their sex demands are not met. The horrifying idea arose in response to a Toronto terrorist attack on women that was sparked by anger over being an involuntary celibate or “incel.” Read the rest of this entry
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RoSo’s Story of Sex-Positivity
Editors note: I’m trying to learn why some women are more sex-positive than others. So I asked my students, if they were interested, to tell me stories of their backgrounds.
So far I have found a few things that distinguish women who experience more sex-negativity and sexual dysfunction. They — and in my youth I would count myself among them — are more likely to:
- Worry that God will punish them for their sexuality
- Have sex-negative parents
- Have sex-negative friends
- If they are slut-shamed by their peers they feel deeply “wrong” and shameful
- They refrain from learning about their sexuality and what works for them
RoSo is a straight 24-year-old woman of East Asian descent. Here is her story: Read the rest of this entry
