Want To Be Objectified? Careful What You Wish For

Sexy David Beckham

Sexy David Beckham

I know women find fit men sexy, but I believe that is the wrong word in a way. If a woman can’t cum from just looking at the male body, then I don’t see that as sexy. Sexy to me means you’re deserving of someone’s desire or orgasm. Most guys are oblivious to the fact that most girls don’t get that aroused from looking at their abs, muscles and penis.

That’s from Eric U. We recently heard from him when I posted another of his comments, wishing that women objectified men.

Be careful what you wish for.

You exist for someone else’s pleasure — And that’s all!

If you are sexually objectified you are seen as 1) being all about sex and nothing else and 2) existing for someone else’s pleasure, not your own.

So objectification can lead to poor treatment and low self-esteem.

If you are seen as existing for someone else’s sexual pleasure, but not your own, you will be lucky to get any pleasure at all. Because how you feel doesn’t really matter.

Sexual objectification, definitionAnd if you’re seen as being all about sex and nothing else, it can harm your chances of getting respect. Or a good job with good pay. It can interfere with achieving your hopes and dreams.

If you want a relationship and not just sex — as most women and men seem to want — but end up feeling like you have just been used for someone’s pleasure and then discarded, you may be left feeling used, empty and drained.

Not meeting sex object standards

Or, what if your worth is confined to how sexually appealing you seem, and you are facing impossible beauty ideals.

Guys who wish they were objectified seem to think that they will easily meet the beauty criteria.

Like when Dustin Hoffman cross-dressed to play Tootsie. He had expected to be attractive. As he told his makeup artists,

You’ve made me a woman, now make me a beautiful woman.

The response:

That’s as good as it gets!

Disheartened, he realized that if he were ever to meet Tootsie at a party, he’d probably ignore her.

Which brings me to this thought from Eric:

Sexy to me means you’re deserving of someone’s desire.

Feeling undeserving and unworthy

That’s what women face, and it leaves a lot of us feeling undeserving and unworthy.

Women can feel they are constantly being judged — and not coming out well. Most develop at least mild eating disorders, like food obsession. And nearly 80% of young women have poor body image.

Actually, as men’s bodies become more sexualized, they are increasingly developing poor body image and eating disorders, too.

Or maybe you meet the standard for a while. And then you age and don’t anymore.

Or maybe your partner is just used to you and now gets way more excited seeing a porn star or some hot young thing walking down the street.

Someone else will always be sexier. As you disappear, others will overtake her attention and draw her lust.

When I said that women often find clothed men sexier than half-naked guys (think: Don Draper) Eric commented that,

Women finding men sexier with clothing on is like men telling women to keep their clothes on all the time, even during sex.

Do you really want to compete with this?

Do you really want to compete with this?

Actually, plenty of women prefer it that way. For clothing covers a host of “imperfections.” Some always wear bras during sex because they think their breasts are too small, too asymmetrical, too droopy, or just not “well-formed.” And many probably wouldn’t mind hiding their tummies, thighs or cellulite.

Distracted from sex

Men, if you had all those body worries you’d be so distracted by how you look — whether worrying about covering imperfections or displaying yourselves in the best light — that your focus would shift to how you look, instead of how you feel. That’s a common cause of sexual dysfunction among women.

Meanwhile, your female partners might be distracted, noticing that you don’t look like perfectly chiseled porn stars.

Maybe that’s why so many women prefer having sex in the dark.

Being visual isn’t necessary to enjoy sexuality. Most often, women aren’t aroused by the visual, nor tribal men or continental Europeans, particularly around the 1980s.

So men, you may wish to be objectified, but you may end up with much more than what you had wished for.

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About BroadBlogs

I have a Ph.D. from UCLA in sociology (emphasis: gender, social psych). I currently teach sociology and women's studies at Foothill College in Los Altos Hills, CA. I have also lectured at San Jose State. And I have blogged for Feminispire, Ms. Magazine, The Good Men Project and Daily Kos. Also been picked up by The Alternet.

Posted on May 18, 2015, in body image, feminism, men, objectification, psychology, sex and sexuality, women and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 54 Comments.

  1. Being objectified feels very uncomfortable. When women are being cat-called, they are being objectified because a woman didn’t ask for his opinion and yet the men don’t care and comment on her body anyways. It is an uncomfortable feeling to know that you are being scanned up and down and being seen as a sexual object. I would think that men who want to be objectified don’t really know the effects of being objectified. You feel like you are always being judged and you begin to feel insecure about every little thing. Women can no longer dress for themselves in order to feel good for themselves. It seems that everything we do is for male pleasure. Recently at work I dressed up a little more than usual and I got a good amount of coworkers asking if i was going out on a date after. They seemed shocked when I answered them that I was dressed up just because I wanted to. When a woman is beautiful society seems to think that she cannot be beautiful for herself and that she must be beautiful for someone else. Men who want to be objectified don’t realize that they would no longer own their beauty or sexiness. They would become objects competing against other objects. Once they realize this, I’m sure they would change their minds.

  2. What really caught my attention about this article is how women don’t need vision to be in a sexual situation. I agree with this because I feel like its the kissing, the touching, etc., that is what makes sex what it is, not really what your looking at. I think that for the guy, its more of both, because there is a pleasure in looking at a female. I do agree how for girls, we don’t get turned on from the vision aspect as much as the feeling. This is an interesting topic and differs for many people. I love the male body and do get aroused by it, but I do think that the female body was naturally more sexualized and more beautiful, especially to look at! This article is so relateable for many women!

  3. I think it’s ridiculous that men would want to be objectified, or experience the same attention that objectified women do. The men who voice this opinion end up coming off as ignorant or just plain oblivious. Women spend their entire lives trying to escape objectification because it’s humiliating and exhausting to deal with. Why any man would want to face these same issues is beyond me, but they can be my guest and take on these problems. Objectification does not make you feel better about your body or enjoy the attention that men place on it. It makes you feel judged and compared to and awful. To all the men that feel this way, feel free to take that on.

  4. I feel like now a days every magazine you open has at least one person man or woman being onjectified into someone being sexy. When you pick up a magazine the first thing you see on most magazine covers is a half naked man or woman posing all sexy. Then I have noticed that every model in the magazines are a lot alike for the men they are all muscular and the woman are all really skinny. Next I noticed that the men are almost always in briefs and the woman are almost always in a sexy swim suit or lingerie.

  5. I don’t think men know what it truly is to be objectified. If men were to be put in the same pedestal as women are they would have lower self-esteem issues and other not so good things. Men would be more pressured to look even more masculine and have that ideal male figure. Although men are getting their a bit now. I think though instead of trying to make themselves more objectified maybe they should do the opposite. Make women come down from that pedestal that they are forced to be on and make them less sexualized than there will be no need to make men to be objectified.

  6. This post brought up a topic that has always been of interest to me. I’ve often wondered whether sexually objectifying men might actually help women in a sense because it would level the playing field. In other words, if an unattainable standard is set for men in the media for physical appearance (as there is for women) would this make people question the images being sent out by pop culture even more given that both genders are struggling to achieve an impossible ideal. It truly saddens me to think about how much value women feel they need to put on their physical appearance. It can become so tied up in a woman’s sense of self worth that every other positive quality she may have can become secondary. As the post mentioned, aging can become such a source of stress because as women age they feel that they will become overshadowed by younger women, and men will lose interest. It seems that either the objectifying nature in the media needs to be applied to both genders, or there needs to be an attempt to represent a lot more diversity in terms of what “beauty” is within the media.

  7. I am glad to hear that a man wanted a perspective of how girls are normally treated. This basically sums up the treatment of us girls, seen majority by our looks and not by how amazing our personalities are. I think I’ve grown so accustomed to people thinking so narrow-mindedly that it doesn’t faze me anymore to hear such discussions or topics as this. It’s a hard mentality though to really get the true perspective of how girls feel in this case, but I do think that this piece does us justice. I do like the comment though that for most Europeans the naked body isn’t really the main attraction because the naked body is normal and they have been desensitized to the effects it might have, but I do also think that this provides a better chance for both men and women to look at the person in another light and if you chemically do well, and intellectually.

  8. In the long run, this objectification of men could turn the tables in women’s favor.
    When men find it difficult to meet the demands that are laid upon them, only then they will realize that their own expectations of perfection from their woman in terms of beauty and physical assets are unrealistic and unfair. No man would like to be treated like a gigolo (whatever the term) and no woman wants to be treated like a whore, not even by her husband. That said, I feel times have changed. Women are also experimenting for the sake of it.
    Moreover, no two cases are the same hence generalization doesn’t work.

    • I’m a sociologist and look at social patterns. These are the social patterns. And maybe when things start turning around so that men are more objectified, maybe there will be more motivation to change.

      • Exactly that’s what I meant…that when they know how the other party feels.

        But such changes do not occur in a day. A whole generation of men will go through some sort of objectification – glorification of six-pack abs, exaggerated importance to material wealth and what not – before the next ones take to seriousness. It happened with women when feminism made them try out every possible thing before they calmed down and learnt what is respectable what is not.
        I began as a science student but also studied sociology, economics and some psychology during my graduation 🙂 before I took to literature, media and IT.
        Enjoy reading your informative posts!

    • >When men find it difficult to meet the demands that are laid upon them

      Do you think that some men “find it difficult to meet the demands that are laid upon them” right now?

  9. “It’s visual in that women can find men attractive – and do all the time. But not visual in terms of sexual stimulus/arousal. Which is why Playgirl goes bankrupt amidst A plethora of girlie magazines.”

    If women can lust for half naked men in person, then there is some stimulation. There is a difference vs finding a man attractive and feeling lust for his body. You agreed with that person who said they can feel lust from some men half naked in person. True lust is not exactly the same as arousal. Though you can still desire someone without being aroused, Sexual interest or lust is not necesarily arousal, but it’s right on the door step. It can set it in the mind to which if something sexy happens or sexual content mixed with attraction and desire to said person, would and could create the arousal to go with or create sexual desire for that person.

  10. It’s true – even though we can intelluctually identify it as a bad thing, on some level we’re still terrified of losing it because people do confuse desirability with objectification. Desirability should be how we’re viewed as people whereas objectification pretty much means we have to divorce the person from the image.

  11. I have to disagree that sexy means being able to look at somebody and be aroused. Men or women do not need to be naked to be attractive. Personally I find a man in a nice suit attractive, followed by a great personality, well thats even sexier. The problem in today’s society is that people think sexy is physical. Yes it is, but it can also be mental, like feeling a connection with a man or woman that you don’t feel with anybody else, thats sexy. Moving forward, people need to realize women and men do not need to be objectified to be seen as sexy, and if people think being naked is sexy, does anybody truly know the meaning of the word?

  12. Nathalie Waldenryd

    I do believe in equal treatment of all genders, and i think we shouldnt objectify anyone in this day and age. Sure it can be sexy but it effects our society in whole in a negative way all the time. Think we should find another way of promoting a product, i mean if it looks good on its own and was a actually good product i would remember it better then if you slap some half naked pictures onto the billboard. I think objectification is also is bad for everyones self image since it makes us think about our bodies in a negative way all the time, and alot of people cant get over it from what they have been tought.

  13. I definitely can relate to that desire to be objectified- we live in a world that makes it seem that worthiness goes up with objectification when really one has nothing to do with the other. But is it no wonder that people think that it’s something worth having? And there is a buzz that comes from objectification that can be hard to let go of for better or worse.

  14. An interesting thing is how it could be culture and biology mixed. Like I read how people are less likely to use the logical part of their mind when seeing a beautiful attractive person sell something on a commercial. That was something that came to my mind. Not the sexualized ads, as I’ve always know how sex sells, atleast when directed toward men. And I just noticed this now, because as a man, 90% of the time I don’t notice guys looks and mainly women who are pretty. But I’m secure with my sexuality so I can acknowledge if a man is good looking too, if something brings my attention to that. While women are commonly sexualized more so than men, and probably more commercials are more likely to have pretty women in them. I’ve noticed though, just in the general aspect how often good looking people are used in commercials compared to average, homely or fat people.

    I’ve noticed commercials where it was about simply metamucil or basic products and nothing sexualized where a woman was talking and she wore regular, nothing revealing clothes and most often you just saw her face. She wasn’t drop dead gorgeous or hot or sexy, but it came to me who she was still quite attractive and pretty and I noticed how she was used instead of say, a fat, non pretty woman. But the same thing I’ve noticed in many commercials that have men too. The guys weren’t fat, but were good looking guys or atleast decent looking guys. I saw a skechers commercial just now with man and women working out. The women were working out, and were in work out gear but the clothes weren’t revealing or sexual, but just women in work out paints and men in workout shorts. But I noticed as far as faces go with the multiple women flashed across the screen, how like all of them were “hot” or beautifiul and very attractive ha and their bodies fit and nice. There was variety of looks and brunettes and blondes, etc, but they are all pretty and attractive in their different looks and how none were fat or unattractive. But the men used all had the facial features and looks that are commonly or conventionally deemed handsome features too and the men were fit as well, so no fat or homely looking men either.

    It does make sense though for shows about workouts and sports for it to show people who look like they workout and fit compared to heavy people and that probalby does help sell the shoes. But it’s interesting how much good looking people and good looks play a role in ads and used for both men and women. The standards of beauty seem cultural, but it seems biological that people just seem to like to look are nice looking people thus selling, which makes sense to, but unfortunate with what it tells people who fall in the below average looking spectrum as far as looks and body goes. The times that a man might be fat or goofy looking in ads is if he’s a known celebrity who happens to look funny and its about promotion through celebrity though often male celebrities chosen are usually good looking “sexy” male celebrities like David Beckham, etc. The few times a man might be fat or below average looking is if its an ad that’s supposed to be funny or its a comedian or say advertising for comedy central where humor is the reason of the schtick. But even for men, many ads often have good looking men in them just like women, except women are often sexualized. But as far as ads without the sexualizing and just showing their faces or non sexual, good looking men and women are often shown and not the fat men and women.

    • The visual aspect has a biological component. But when the visual is connected to sexual arousal, it seems to be learned since it varies from culture to culture. But even there there’s a distinction between sex and looking at a body part. Wouldn’t surprise me if men of all cultures got aroused from witnessing the sex act.

  15. Most women like to look at a perfect male body…or even if it’s not perfect, some particular aspect may attract specific women. But, sexual arousal for women, I think, doen’t only depend on the nakedness of a male body….

  16. “Being visual isn’t necessary to enjoy sexuality” – sort of like “Money isn’t everything…but it ranks right up there with oxygen.” (Rita Davenport, author & TV producer) 🙂

  17. Julieta Torres

    To me is funny to even think that men would want to be seen as “Sexy”, because in all reality sexy is more than just the word it self. To men, they think that we women see sexy as the physical attributes they can have, when in reality to us women, sexy is a lot more than just the body of a men. The brain of a women thinks way different when it comes to getting an arouse just by looking at his picture all naked and “sexy”. We may look at those pictures for fun but that sure is not enough to lead the thought into pleasuring our selves just by thought of his picture, their is for sure a lot more. I mean yes when we women see a men out in street that we consider sexy we look and stare and are amaze of how sexy that men could be, but is not enough to want to get arouse. In my opinion the word “Sexy” has a lot more than just the word itself, at least to me. I think that we all, women and men can be sexy and wanted by someone badly, its just depends who attracts you and who you are attracted to.

    • That’s why I’m sometimes envious of men. Except for the downside, like the things I described in the post.

    • And, sexy is part of objectification, But you can be sexy without objectifying.

    • Men want to be seen as sexy for their bodies, because doing so makes it less boxes to check so to speak like you explained. Men have to be so many things to be sexy to women, when sometimes it seems nice to be sexy because you are physically attractive, because it could be easier to get dates or laid. It’s nice to be lusted for, for your body and a turn on. So you’re not getting the point. Men know women can find men sexy, but men know its usually more than looks and other things. Sometimes its nice to have a woman lust for your body and want you and not have to wine and dine, and have chemistry, click, be this and that for her and somethign arbitrary, etc. There’s a trade off, women probably want to be wanted badly for their personality, intelligence, etc and not simply their beauty.

      But men would like to be lusted for their body and not have to do all these things or have these things to attract women who are more selective as a result. I don’t know if women would like it if men were as selective either as women would feel how rejection feels for men. If men weren’t so easily pleased by looks and body, women would have to win men over more with various things. Men like that they are looked in an overall sense, but its also why it’s harder for men to attract women and get women to want sex with them. It’s a catch 22. More women aroused easier from simply the physical, the less work he has to do and easier for him to get laid. The more selective and more than looks he needs to show, the more “boxes” he has to check to fit her criteria of what she wants in a man thus she’s attracted to and would date or have sex with.

  18. “Trust me, women feel lust all the time over 1/2 naked men (at least real life in-person men. Pictures? Not so much).

    BroadBlogs | May 18, 2015 at 11:08 am
    Lust, yes. (If it’s the right sort of sexy images: https://broadblogs.com/2015/05/06/do-women-see-sexy-men-as-sexy-2/)”

    You see from quixie’s post and youre agreement with it? Is that not visual stimulation? I remember you saying it’s more about how a woman feels that sparks things with her man. Yeah a woman isn’t going to be aroused by just seeing a nude picture of a man or blatantly aroused. But if women feel lust and desire, then something visually has sparked something to them, to peak sexual interest and desire. That is visual stimulation too just not in an objectified, blatant way like it is for men who get turned on just by images or just from nudity regarless of the context because of how women’s bodies are sexualized. And that’s why I even though women don;t get turned on like men. It’s the reason despite that, that I still felt women do get some visual stimulation from men’s bodies, thought it’s probably a dual stimulation together with emotional and visual together.

    Though like I’ve said, there are plenty of times where men with their gfs, who might be sexy men or good looking already and a nice body. But I’ve dealt with it and I’m sure other men have where they are dressing nice or a nice shirt on that their gf loves and looks good. That shirt maybe shows off their man’s physique really well and he’s looking really sexy in it and his cologne or whatever smells really good. Or their bf is just coming back from the gym, so his muscles are pumped out with his tight form fiting under armor shirt, and maybe the sweat and pheromones or then after taking a shower and looking good and smelling good when out.

    These instances can spark visual lust for the sexiness her man is showing and looking and could spark sexual interest in her mind and desire. A sexual context created of their man’s body from the situation and context and their gf having a strong visual appreciaiton for their man’;s body in different instances, so can spark lust and their is the emotional foundation already because they are already attracted to their bfs, like or love their bfs and now the physical sexy body element in a sexy, sexual context.

    • There is a difference between finding the opposite sex attractive, and feeling lust, and being able to become sexually aroused just by seeing their naked body. Pretty much all women feel the first two things, but few, if any, feel the last.

      • Well that is visual stimulation then is it not? You probably are thinking…well duh, women do have eyes too. But then again, after reading seeing things for this site, I’ve begun to have a pretty low expectation of women’s libidos and sex drive and visual desire.

      • It’s visual in that women can find men attractive – and do all the time. But not visual in terms of sexual stimulus/arousal. Which is why Playgirl goes bankrupt amidst A plethora of girlie magazines.

  19. Part of the reason women are so analytical about how they look and how that effects their desire is because they are not as or so aroused by men’s bodies, so it’s easier to be so consumed with yourself to further make it a problem. Men can be more objectified but it’s still less likely to cause men during sex to be thinking about their own body even if they are more self conscious now. Because men are visually aroused and so sexually focused on women’s bodies that their own self conscious thoughts would be drowned out by the sexually alluring naked beauty before them in bed. Men would still want the lights on most likely, because the rise they’d get from seeing their woman’s body.

    • Probably. Also: 1) they think that that’s how they need to be in bed and 2) they think that is how society values them. But as men are starting to become objectified they are beginning to get eating disorders at higher levels, too.

      • Well yeah it would be even worse for me as a man if I feel I have to be ripped to be wanted because, I’d already not feel wanted already, since men have to approach women and dates and sex are generally harder for men to get compared to women. So there’s enough obstacles for men to get dates and not they’d have to feel even more undesirable, becuase of their bodies to add to that and to feel even more of a reason for girls not wanting them. They can’t just flash their chest and get a quick buzz to feel lust from a girl or validation if feeling not wanted like a girl could lol to stroke his ego. Not that a girl would do that unless you’re talking mardi gras ha. But I’m just saying men would have more body pressure without getting the visual lust to go with it. so no reward for the body being sculpted, because of women being less visual so even with that a man still has to have personality, charm, maybe a good job, funny, maybe a certain status etc to attract girls.

        Yeah men would feel terrible, because men can feel undesirable and neglected as it is, this would only be more salt to the wound that already exists. I’ve already told you what a hit, not getting laid and dates, can take on a man’s ego. It’s the equivialent of a man feeling like he’s morbidly obese and ugly even if he’s not and actually decent looking, because of how undesirable it can make him feel and frustrated. It’s just as much of a sting on his self esteem as it is for women who feel they are fat, maybe even worse. Because men’s esteem can be tied very much to “results” if you are not having any “results”, then surely you must be a very undesirable man and worthless and well very, very sexually frustrating, as well as the sting of feeling unwanted, and lack of attention and lust that your body could stoke either. So you’re not getting laid and feel undesirable and now it seems women just want a certain body that you don’t have to add to the other qualities that you don’t show, because like many people, you are shy or get anxious talking to girls at bars or approaching, so even more added.

      • My guess is that they wouldn’t feel of things. It’s more of a trade off. But a lot of men who complain about women not finding them desirable think that The fact that women don’t objectify men means more than it does. Women do find men desirable. It just isn’t the urgent, I’m going to masturbate to a naked man if nothing else, feeling.

  20. men or continental Europeans, particularly around the 1980s.””

    European men were visual in the 1980s, they just weren’t at topless beaches, because they saw it all the time and because it was in an non sexual context. Those same women topless at the beaches, if they say, fondled their breasts, tweaked their nipples seductively while biting their lips and looking at a man lustfully at the topless beach. I would bet money he would be turned on by her body. Even though all the times before he wasn’t because he saw it all the time and the context was not sexual. I don’t know if you could say that about women toward a man’s body. A man can’t do something seductively in a sexual way, where it would turn a woman on just like that. Even though men are in a non erotic enviroment and bodies not sexualized because the nudity is common. It doesn’t take away the fact that men in europe still would have the potential to be visually aroused by sexy women’s sexually attractive bodies.

    I don’t want to be a sex object and I don’t expect women to get turned on or masturbate just from seeing a nude man. But I would like to feel my body is visually and sexually desirable when the emotional meets the visual. Like to be lusted more visually without crossing the line of object which I think can be done as like as men’s worth is still intact and kept that way. And men have body disorders not simply because more sexualizing, but because it’s even worse for men. Women can feel undesirable because they keep comparing to fake images and women who probably represent one percent of the female population. It’s stupid in a way. You don’t see men getting depressed because they can’t sing or have a career like Adam Levine or not pro athletes or lebron james, etc. Men wish they had that amazing talent and might not feel great about their un eliteness, but most men are based on reality and don’t fret about something unrealistic and spend their time worrying about that, because lebron james and adam levine, are exceptions, rare, and greatly talented performers. It’s a waste of time fretting about not being talented like lebron james when most people aren’t, just like it’s a waste of time feeling bad because your body doesn’t look lke the victoria’s secret model. Because most aren’t just like most men aren’t lebron james. That’s just life and reality.

    And it’s worse for men, and why they might feel bad, because women still have men wanting their bodies even if not perfect. Men already feel they have to check enough boxes as it is for a woman to want or like him. Now he has to have a perfect body? Women want a perfect body because they can’t stand the idea of not being the best or their man fidning another woman’s body more attractive, even if she’s desirable to other men. If a man gets more attention, then its a problem. Whereas, men feel more from the body issue because they feel to have to look good to compete with the hot men, but even if these men have good bodies, they aren’t getting rewarded for it with lust from women. A man can be good looking and fit, but if he’s shy or not extroverted, he isn’t getting laid or dates. So a man not successful will only feel more pressure or more undesirable, because he doesn’t get the feedback like many women do who might be otherwise average in looks and body. A woman might not want just sex, but if she’s feel undesirable and wants to feel desired. All the has to do is wear something showing nice cleavage and I’m sure a nice looking man will notice and secretly lust. A man can’t do that. He can’t just take his shirt off and feel lust which could make he feel wanted and desired. Even a fit man might get looks and appreciation, but it wouldn’t mean she actually wants sex with him as he’d still have to approach, and talk and charm her and her to know him and him know her and to go from there. Which could be a few dates and her liking him more, until she wants sex with him and then the proof of actual lust for him.

    • Okay. Thanks for your thoughts. By the way, by “Visual” I mean causing arousal via visual images. Not too long ago a guy from Europe insisted that men are visual and later said that, “well we don’t get aroused by naked bodies.” Which is probably more true of Western Europeans than American men, since there’s just more nudity in Europe.

    • Trust me, women feel lust all the time over 1/2 naked men (at least real life in-person men. Pictures? Not so much).

      • Lust, yes. (If it’s the right sort of sexy images: https://broadblogs.com/2015/05/06/do-women-see-sexy-men-as-sexy-2/)

        But women just don’t objectify men in the way men objectify women: https://broadblogs.com/2014/05/05/do-women-objectify-men/

        And few women masturbate to naked pictures of men. That’s why Playgirl went bankrupt amidst A plethora of girlie magazines

        A lot of people confuse objectification with desire. I did when I was younger. They’re two different things, Although related. Desire is a part of objectification, but there’s more: seen a person as just an object that exists to gratify someone other than the sexy person, herself (Usually). You stop caring about the feelings of the sexy person, Or your partner. And when the object of desire is so sexualized to that they are objects for masturbation, it just makes it harder to resist treating someone that way. Although a person could behave differently. But you find also that objectification leads to Poor body image and eating disorders, Because people also feel pressured to fit the sexy image.

      • I personally have trouble objectifying others and I think that’s a good thing. 😊 it’s great that most women don’t do this either. Now, how do we stop men from objectifying women?

      • Plenty of men don’t. But self-awareness and awareness of how it hurts might help.

      • My own husband doesn’t objectify so I can see that, although I think many men struggle with it. I don’t think most many realize how harmful it is to women?

      • I don’t think they do either. Which is partly why so many of them want to be objectified, themselves. They’ll see how it hurts.

  21. It involves viewing and treating another person’s body as an object valued based on its sexual appeal, usually to the neglect of other aspects of the person, such as their thoughts, feelings, and desires. Objectifying images and messages are widespread in American society, and they communicate not only that women’s value lies in their appearance, but they also present an ideal of attractiveness that is unattainable (link is external)for most women.

    • Well put. Not so sure that guys would like that if they were actually in that situation. Plus all the other stuff — having to compare yourself to some perfect ideal and not coming out so perfectly, for instance.

      • Exactly – I agree with you – In other words, for people who base their self-worth on appearance (aka most of us, to some extent), self-objectification may be a double-edged sword. It feels great when you’re getting positive attention, but it can easily turn sour when attention is negative or lacking, and these ups and downs can wreak havoc on mental and physical health.

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