Brock Turner, Omar Mateen and the Domination Mindset
Brock Turner and Omar Mateen both share a domination mindset.
- Men dominate women
- Turner raped a female acquaintance. Because men have a right to control women’s bodies
- Research ties rape to a belief in male superiority and entitlement
- Turner has promised to fight “promiscuity,” which really means “promiscuous women.” People don’t worry much about “promiscuous men.”
- Men dominate women
- Mateen controlled and battered his wife
- Men cannot be “like women,” for that makes men and women too equal:
- Gays blur the gender line. Think: feminine gay stereotypes. Plus, gay men have sex like women, right?
- Gay couples don’t have a male head. Neither do lesbian couples.
- Mateen believed his religion should dominate everyone
- Mateen’s violence made him (in)famous. And “on top” in that way
Men are taught to see the world in terms of hierarchy, power, winners and losers.
Does domination make you happy?
But does a domination mindset make you happy?
The mindset creates insecurity. Worries about being on top. Measuring up. Being good enough.
Turner’s insecurity within the campus hierarchy may have led him to rape an unconscious woman in an attempt to up his “sexual conquest score.” Because these folks blur sex and rape. The phenomenon is not uncommon among frat boys and jocks. Turner may not have even enjoyed it — just looking for points.
Mateen lived in constant rage. And now he is dead.
The people Mateen and Turner attacked have been gravely harmed. Some are dead.
A domination mentality creates a world of hurt.
Posted on June 22, 2016, in feminism, LGBTQ+, men, psychology, rape and sexual assault, sexism and tagged battering, Brock Turner, domination mentality, homophobia, LGBTQIA, men, Omar Mateen, psychology, sexual assault, terrorism. Bookmark the permalink. 17 Comments.
“Men are taught to see the world in terms of hierarchy, power, winners and losers.”
I think most people are taught to see the world in terms of hierarchy, power, winners and losers. Men are socialized to rank the achievements of their peers, while women are expected to rank themselves in relation to other women (often based on looks and appearance.) Omar Mateen and Brock Turner are extreme victims of hierarchy and its implied sexism. Women are secondary, women cannot occupy a humanized existence like men, women must be limited. These are all notions Turner and Mateen internalized and used to justify acts of violence against people. Brock Turner and his father didn’t believe a jail sentence was necessary for ’20 minutes of action’ because women are often viewed as objects devoid of rights, choice and power. To the likes of Turner and his father, Brock Turner was just doing what patriarchal men should do- in the context of cultural sexist hierarchies.
Omar Mateen was a serial batterer (and eventually murderer) who victimized and targeted the powerless, most likely because he lacked power in his own life. It is easy and fleeting to abuse others, but the empowerment fades. Violence against the vulnerable is akin to an addictive high- euphoric but depressing after the fun ends. Empowerment comes from sustained, meaningful achievement that benefits others.
“I think most people are taught to see the world in terms of hierarchy, power, winners and losers.”
I think you are right. That’s what happens in domination cultures. But it’s also part of the male role because men are the ones who’re taught to dominate.
I appreciate your points.
Well, this article is just way too sad. And just for the sake of it, there are many other alternative things, for men to “show off” how manly they are, than just raping. In my opinion, Turner is seemed as a terrible person rather than manly. And I don’t see how controlling a women’s body could be a good thing, it’s truly so ineffective, because that is not seen as an admirable habit. It’s just sick, to treat a human being that way.
Yeah, maybe I wasn’t clear enough when discussing Brock Turner but it’s not to say that rape makes him manly, rather that he’s trying to feel a sense of himself as “Big man” which he defines as powerful, superior, dominant, aggressive. You don’t have to define “a man” that way. And certainly not a good man.
Because really he is behaving in a subhuman way.
This is why I find it so hard that so many men find that feminism is hurtful to them or that it’s not their cause. It’s crazy that they don’t see that the very same things that hurt women hurt them to albeit in a different way. Men are pushed every day to be “manly”, “in charge” and “masculine”. Often if they don’t meet these standards they are ostracized or made to feel unworthy or not good enough. This dominant mentality is a holdover from a time past where being dominant was the only way to survive due to constant attacks from invaders, constant calls to war, threats to their homelands; it doesn’t belong in a world where we are stable and that all people are equal including women. It’s incredibly sad that men are so wrapped up in trying to get to the top and be on top that they don’t stop to ask “on top of what and for why”. But then again perhaps it’s less of a societal thing or learned behavior but more of an inherent thing. Perhaps men are inherently more prone to dominance because it’s biological however since we aren’t in a society that is conducive to that it becomes dangerous to all especially when it gets coupled with a society that encourages that.
Yeah, I sometimes hear from men’s rights activists who blame feminism for all their problems — and then I show them how the real source of their problem is sexism. (And then I don’t hear back from them.)
Yeah, it really makes me laugh sometimes at how much men’s activists want to blame feminism for all their problems as though before feminism their lives were amazing and now they are being oppressed and enslaved. But I guess as some have said when you have traditionally been in power and have long had unrestrictive power, equality can feel a lot like oppression. But what really makes it super funny is that most of their complaints revolve around access to women or women no longer being susceptible to them. So sad it’s funny.
Yeah: “when you have traditionally been in power and have long had unrestrictive power, equality can feel a lot like oppression.”
And I’ve written a bit about how men are hurt by sexism here, if you care to take a look:
Feminists Must Fight For Men’s Rights?
(read down to his subtitle “Sexism against men comes from sexism against women”)
Elliott Roger Blames Women For Patriarchy’s Problems
Men Commit Suicide Because of Feminism?
It is so sad that men are in constant need of trying to prove their authority. It must get tiring to have to constantly have to prove oneself. What is even more sad is that they feel the need to put down other people in order to prove their authority. I feel that men especially when they are boys are always taught to be better than the other boys. There were always taught that they had to run faster or be better than the other kids; and if they were not the best then they were not good enough. This leads to boys putting down other people and it is unfortunate that boys are taught from a young age that it is okay to put other people to get authority. I think that we need to be more conscious of what we are telling our boys because these men thought that what they did was right because they were taught. They thought that what they did was right even though it is not.
It’s just so gross. It’s hard to fathom that we can still be living in this world that in many ways still feels so primitive.
We are slowly moving out of this mindset, and it’s strange how normal it can seen when you’re inside of it, And how strange it seems when you’re outside of it.
Very good piece! I enjoyed very much.
I think much of what we see in male behavior really boils down to what you mentioned: control.
I was having a business conversation with a woman earlier today who is a physician. She is in her early 60s and divorced three years ago after being married for 30 odd years. She told me a story about her ex husband, calling her while she was on a trip to NYC to admonish her for buying a pair of shoes! He saw the transaction on the bank account that day. Honestly, I found this rather crazy. The woman earns in excess of $200,000 a year. Btw, he is a full professor of psychology.
I simply asked myself as a man just why on earth would a man feel it was his place to question his wife who: 1) is a physician, 2) makes her own money, 3) a Dartmouth Medical School grad about anything like that! The only thing I could think of was he felt he had the right to do so as a man and her husband. To me that is just plain nuts.
Thanks for sharing the story Huggy. I have a couple of in-laws, One for the husband is very dominant and my husband just laughs it off. And one where the wife is more dominant and my husband is appalled. He doesn’t even notice male domination until I ask him to try turning it around. He’s a feminist in other ways but this can be deep-seeded stuff.
Who create such a mentality? Many cultures around the globe gloat at producing a male child, indulge in female infanticide, honour killings and oppression of women. Cultural conditioning, conservatism and traditional thinking, which is enforced and handed down through genes and training…how can we root that out? A long and endless battle!
Yeah, I’ll have to write more on that topic! WHY, why, why?!
Interesting. It’s too bad things are this way.
Sure is. Hoping to make change.