Category Archives: psychology
Open Marriage Hasn’t Caught On?
Open marriage, the sensible alternative to monogamy?
On the plus side, a couple may enjoy a close-knit family and loving spousal relationship, but with an exciting dash of sexual variety.
Sex columnist, Dan Savage, is all for it. But he acknowledges that there are advantages to monogamy: sexual safety from infections, emotional safety, paternity assurances.
Still, he thinks monogamy brings boredom, despair, lack of variety, sexual death and being taken for granted. Plus, society imposes monogamy on men, who were never expected to be monogamous, he complains. Read the rest of this entry
Straight vs Gay Slut-Shaming
In straight culture women are often shamed for having sex while men are celebrated.
But things may be reversed in gay culture. “Heather” wrote in to say:
I agree completely that straight women tend to slut-shame other straight women and that straight men congratulate other straight men for their “sexual conquests.”
But in my experience that is not the case in the LBGT+ community. I’m straight myself, but among my gay and lesbian friends things seem to be the opposite: gay men slut-shame gay men, and lesbians congratulate lesbians.
Girls = Boys in Math
In the US boys outperform girls in math. But we’re an outlier. As a Slate article describes it:
The only countries with a wider gap favoring boys are Colombia and Liechtenstein. Many Middle Eastern countries—notably Qatar, Jordan, and the U.A.E.—report a significant gender gap in favor of girls (though lower math scores overall). In Hong Kong, Singapore, and South Korea, the gender gap is miniscule, and the math scores are high. Shanghai registers no gender gap between boys and girls—together, they’re outperforming other teenagers across the globe.
Be Wonder Woman — Your Way
Why would watching warriors prepare for battle evoke tears of deep emotion?
How could a cartoon character be transformative?
I puzzled over those questions when friends and movie reviewers, alike, shared their experience of Wonder Woman.
It made no sense.
I’ve seen plenty of battles and felt mostly bored: chaotic fighting, and you know who will win anyway.
Wonder Woman is transformative?! I read her comics as a kid… no transformation.
Curious, I went to see the film.
And… as Amazon warrior women practiced their skills tears well up.
What?! Read the rest of this entry
Leaving Westboro Baptist Church.. and Other Bubbles
When Donald Trump ran for President I lived in a liberal bubble.
Obviously, he was uninformed, self-interested, hot tempered — and just might blow up the world. And his sexist buffoonery appalled me.
I mocked him on Facebook, thinking no one else took him seriously, either.
And then some “red” friends unfriended me.
That got me out of my bubble.
I stopped chiding him and started trying to understand them.
And then something strange happened. Read the rest of this entry
“Moana,” Men and Masculinity
By “Bob”
Moana is out on video so I bought it for my niece and nephew. As we watched it I was surprised at the truths it told about men and masculinity. Read the rest of this entry
Stirring Up Feminazis
What’s the difference between being powerful and merely feeling powerful?
Too often people chase the feeling and give up the real thing.
I sense the phenomenon when frat boys try to feel powerful by intimidating women.
Or when feminists are called “feminazis.” Read the rest of this entry
Real Men Don’t Beat, Rape Women
By Ted Esparza
Constance Johnson was a domestic violence prosecutor – and also a battered wife.
She met her husband, Ben, in college and fell in love. They got married and were very happy for three years.
But then he began criticizing her. Everything was her fault. He was always right. And she was too fat — at 110 lbs.
After they moved near her husband’s aging parents to help them – Ben’s idea — the violence began. He didn’t seem happy after the move and one morning he decided he didn’t like his breakfast.
“Make it yourself.” Constance told him.
— SLAP — Read the rest of this entry
Richer Than A King, He Put A Bullet Through His Brain
By “Bob”
These words seem to strike a nerve among men:
Whenever Richard Cory went down town,
We people on the pavement looked at him
He was a gentleman from sole to crown,
Clean favored, and imperially slim.…
And he was rich – yes, richer than a king –
And admirably schooled in every grace:
In fine, we thought that he was everything
To make us wish that we were in his place.
So on we worked, and waited for the light,
And went without the meat, and cursed the bread
And Richard Cory, one calm summer night,
Went home and put a bullet through his head. Read the rest of this entry






