Pro-Sex Assault, Anti-Condom, Anti-Abortion

Trump and Kavanaugh

Contradiction abounds among too many Republican leaders of the male persuasion. 

These men are anti-abortion yet fight against contraception — the most effective means of preventing one. 

Or they are anti-abortion until they want their partners to get one. 

Or they engage in sexual assault even while acting to prevent women and girls from accessing abortion should they be impregnated by such a horrifying act. 

It all sounds contradictory. But patriarchy ties it all altogether.

Right now Brett Kavanaugh is being considered for a seat on the Supreme Court. He is both anti-abortion and, if Christine Blasey Ford’s allegation against him is true* he sexually assaulted her when they were both teenagers. If Kavanaugh’s full intention had been rape he may have impregnated her had she not escaped. But of course he is against abortion. 

In a related contradiction, former deputy finance chair of the Republican National Committee, Elliott Broidy, admires Trump’s “uncanny ability to sexually abuse women and get away with it,” reports The New York Times. Yet he and Trump have both been leaders in a political party that fights against both birth control and abortion. So Trump and Broidy think it’s okay to sexually assault women but women shouldn’t have access to abortion if they become impregnated by an assault?

Mr. Broidy also refused to wear condoms when he had sex with his mistress — and then insisted she get an abortion once he impregnated her. And despite his “official” stand against abortion.

Meanwhile, Donald J. Trump has not only raped women (as reported by his former wife, Ivana), he also refuses to wear condoms — say his lovers. Yet when his girlfriend (and future wife) Marla Maples got pregnant he asked, “Well, what are we going to do about this?″ Now what option might that be for an anti-abortion president?

It’s all contradictory on one level.

It’s all of a sort on another:

In such a world women have no freedom over their bodies but men have complete freedom to do whatever they will. Men get what they want. Women pay the price. It all sustains patriarchy.


*Christine Blasey Ford sounds credible, having passed a lie detector test, having corroborating notes from her therapist, and having nothing personally to gain by lying but much to lose even by telling the truth. She also wants an FBI investigation. It’s not illegal to lie to Congress. It is illegal to lie to the FBI.

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About BroadBlogs

I have a Ph.D. from UCLA in sociology (emphasis: gender, social psych). I currently teach sociology and women's studies at Foothill College in Los Altos Hills, CA. I have also lectured at San Jose State. And I have blogged for Feminispire, Ms. Magazine, The Good Men Project and Daily Kos. Also been picked up by The Alternet.

Posted on September 24, 2018, in rape and sexual assault, violence against women and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 57 Comments.

  1. In my opinion, Donald and Brett are two of the most despicable humans I have seen in high positions of power. During the time that Christine came forward with her allegation against Brett, I gained so much respect for her. She knew she was going to be torn apart in the public eye, but she also knew she could not just sit by and let such a horrible man be elected to the Supreme Court. The day he got elected brought up a lot of the same emotions I felt when Trump got elected. I was overwhelmed with a feeling of hopelessness and anger, mainly due to the fact that women seem to be so ignored in society. I believe that in the future, we will look back on this time period and shake our heads wondering how we could have ignored the rights of women and minorities so easily.

  2. When the trial of Kavanaugh versus Ford came out and the judge declared his verdict, it was truly a moment of the government doing the wrong decision just for political gain. Both powerful men, President Trump and now supreme court judge Kavanaugh, are shown to be an example of the latest hypocrisy. Both men stand for anti-abortion, but also pro-sexual assault. Their stance is that women shouldn’t have the right of abortion even in the case of rape. The entire idea is absolutely ridiculous, but are exactly the political view of such powerful men. This ties into the social construction of gender roles, and how the men are to make decisions for everyone around them and the women just naturally accept it, and the reason why these men are trying to make abortion illegal without being female themselves just shows their patriarchal ways. Both powerful men have been proven in the past to condone sexual assault and overall go against everything they have a stance about. Its time for us as the people to use the power of democracy in our government, and get rid of the corruption of our government, and start to make a society of acceptance and free will.

  3. Reading things like this boil my blood. Men, especially men who have a huge position in politics happen to always try and take control over things that they have nothing to do with. Abortions and condom use should be ultimately up to the women. It is their body. Men having a say in what women do with their body does not make sense, especially when they pick and choose what they want from specific women as if their body was some sort of game. In reality men always seem to assume that because they are participating in a sexual activity with a women their say on how things go is somehow the only thing that matters. Women are often silenced and shut down for wanting to use condoms, and even having abortions. When women do try and speak up they immediately get shut down.

  4. Hey Bob, this inspired a post. It’s coming on Monday. I’ll be curious to hear your thoughts.”

    The viral tweet I posted or topic just itself or my comment to what you said? I hope you read what I said too ha. I know I write too much sometimes, but I tried to minimize it as much as I could as there was a lot for me to say as you could guess as a man. It’s hard for me to understand that needed to point out or why guys don’t get catcalling women could be scary or like aware that women have fears that men might not think about in some ways. Like I didn’t need to see that tweet to know that. But it seems too many thoughts in life are binary. And like life, things can be complex. I already said the issues, but I don’t see why there couldn’t have been a duality. Men don’t have to fear rape, and sexual assault from strangers because women are more of a target of that from men, plus women are more vulnerable because of the size, strength disadvantage women have defending themselves. But tons of men die by male strangers every day too and yes they are by men.

    But when a question specifically targets women, it’s purpose I get is to have empathy and understanding to women. But in a way it feels like with it being specific to women and not male victims from men or male victims, it seems as usual. Male victims matter less, just like in those videos I showed in the other post. Just like men can be ignorant of what women go through, the tweets and replies by women showed how sad it made me feel that many women have such anxiety. But some of the same women answering made suggestions as if men don’t worry about things. There are things I may not worry about like women would. But like going to my car at night with little lights and stuff, I’m on guard too. It doesn’t matter that I’,m tough or strong, criminals don’t play by the rules. A dude with a gun neutralizes things fast or a bunch of men or a man with a big knife or baseball bat.

    • I think that in certain ways the idea that men are big and tough can disadvantage them because people don’t think about how men are more likely to be victims of violence than women are, or how men can be hurt by sexual assault and sexual harassment. Our stereotype that men are big and tough keeps people from thinking about that. And then you end up with less compassion and concern for men.

  5. Many of the current republican legislation impose their own ideas on without considering the other side. Elliot Broidery was a man who strictly agaisnt an abortion, but because he never had to worry about an abortion personally, i is easy for him to go against it. Now that he faced the problem first hand, he understood why it is important to allow women to get abortions. Even when they face the problem at first hand, they are still stubborn on changing sides because their stubborn ideas will stick with them because of their close-mindedness. As a society and as a country, we cannot allow these people to run office. Sadly, there are many people who have the same stubborn mind as many of the politicians in the government who vote for these people, but this should not dissuade us. With the Mueller investigation, we may be finally able to remove stubborn-minded people in the government so we must not give up.

  6. I think the results of the Kavanaugh hearing show how the older generation feels about sexual conduct. To me it seems like until we either more women or men that have different ideals and/or motives to be in places of higher power to make a change. I strongly think that woman are entitled to do with their bodies as they please so I also think anti abortion is wrong because that basically diffuses the woman’s freedom to explore what’s best for herself. Also tying in the fact that a woman is raped or in some other way sexually assaulted and abortions are illegal that isn’t fair to her for multiple reasons especially in that situation it isn’t even her fault for being pregnant. Also with condoms, I think those are also a consensual thing. If people don’t want abortions to be legal they definitely better be ready to wear condoms if they want to prevent pregnancies. Also condoms are made for both sexes so there should be no excuse to try to deny those either.

    • The main reason he got confirmed is that billionaire Republican donors have been wanting to stack the court in favor of the billionaires for decades and this was finally their chance. More important than Republicans keeping the Senate because the court changes law for a generation. The Senate changes every six years. And not even the entire Senate. Billionaires > US.

  7. I was shocked, but I understood deeply. I believe having a baby is great things for everyone’s life. I want to have some children in my future with my future husband. It means men and women should be careful and wear a condom and take pills if they do not want to have a baby or they can not be responsible for them and their partner’s lives. I was taking a pill because my period did not come more than 3 months because of stress. Then I remember that my ex-boyfriend became not to wear a condom because he noticed that I took a pill. I know that is ridiculous, but I think so many men do or did same things. My female friends took pills or wear IUS because their boyfriends do not want to wear a condom. Many male guys want to have sex without a condom because that is more comfortable, but they were not ready to get married. Every time, if people do not want to pregnant, female should do something by themselves to protect. That is so sad.

  8. The contradictions you bring up are so common in today’s politicians, and seem to be a shared trait in many republican “leaders”. I find that despite these visible contradictions, many voters will still want to vote for these people. I actually don’t understand an anti-birth control stance because I have yet to hear a good reason to support such a stance. When I see these people who identify as supporters of stances do things that are a contradiction, that stance loses credibility in my eyes. Personally, I am pro-choice and believe that nobody but the woman should really have a say in what a woman does with her own body. I think that birth control and abortion both should be left to the choice of the woman. I don’t think it should matter if a person has religious reasons for being against it, or if they think it’s morally wrong. It should be a choice for the woman as the woman is the one that would have to carry a child. These contradictory politicians especially should not have a say.

  9. History has shown time and time again that hypocrisy plagues those in power. Brett Kavanaugh is anti-abortion, but if the allegations are true, he may have impregnated an unwilling person. Elliot Broidery refuses to wear condoms, but makes his spouse receive an abortion. Trump in 1999, was once sponsored a dinner for the president of the National Abortion Rights Action League, Emeritus, at his Plaza Hotel in 1999. One of the problems plaguing powerful politicians is the self-centered attitude they take about serious topics. Many of these people base their beliefs on traditional views and the views of their peers. Many people use distorted interpretations of the Bible as a evidence to support pro-life. An example people to support their cause is a story in Exodus chapter 21 in which a pregnant woman steps between two couples and gets punched by the man. She miscarriages because of it and the man is punished for it. What most people forget is that the miscarriage was payed back as if it were a loss of property, not a loss of life. These politicians uses wrong interpretations of the bible, but even if the bible did support abortion, they have no right to prevent any non-Christian from having an abortion. These politicians know what their doing and know that their stance is false which is why many politicians are hypocritical in their beliefs. This raises the question of why these politicians support their controversial views even if they don’t believe it it? It is because these greedy politicians only worry about how they are perceived by others and in the case of Trump, Kavanaugh, and Elliot; they want to look good in the eyes of republicans, but as soon as their own ideology turns on them, they contradict themselves in their actions while still trying to keep up the false persona.

  10. Eli Harrison Pritchard

    Truth be told it’s not really surprising republicans pushed Kavanaugh through since it is neither a unique event in American history (nor did they ever state the contrary). The stance of being both anti-abortion and birth control has been contradictory, since being anti one does not preclude the other. Perhaps it lies in conservatism basses in religion, however I am unsure if there is explicit mention of either in the bible (not that matters). Roe v. Wade being overturned would stand a tremendous blow to women’s reproductive rights, yet this has been happening in red states for decades disregarding any court decision. Republicans lawmakers have been over regulating to shut down planned parenthoods for a while, not to forget the ruling on running fake abortion centers. One thing that has always confused me is even if you have some disingenuous argument (I.E its murder) there are societal reasons abortion should exist like cases of rape, incest, pregnancy’s that threaten the mother’s life. I think it strange to me republicans think abortion will go away since in countries that have bans on it just causes people to either migrate or seek an illegal abortion. Honestly this whole ordeal has just told that republicans are permissive when it come sexual assault vocally, repeatedly and in a large public hearing(again).

    • Yeah. Making abortion illegal doesn’t make it go away. It just drives it underground. And then more women and girls die.

      Republican billionaire donors Are absolutely determined to get a conservative Supreme Court that will consistently rule in favor of corporations and wealthy interests and against ordinary Americans. If you look at the Republican nominees so far that’s how they consistently rule. The donors thought it was more important to get the supreme court packed than to Keep the Senate Republican since the court will affect an entire generation. The Republicans would have lost their donors if they hadn’t forced him on.

      • That’s funny, the right wing news outlets’ talking point is that the democrats are full of neocons who want to pack the supreme Court because their billionaire donors are making too much money from planned parenthood and abortions and are captive to their wealthy donors against ordinary Americans’ interests.

        Arguing something should be made legal because people will do it anyway is the most morally bankrupt argument ever, and could be deployed to justify anything.

      • The difference between left-wing Billionaire donors and right wing Billionaire donors Is that those on the right wing are making an investment. They give a relatively small amount of money and get huge tax cuts in return, huge deregulation that saves them a lot of money even as it poisons the air and water of ordinary Americans, or make products they buy more dangerous, or makes working condition is more dangerous, etc.

        When left-wing billionaires give money to politicians they are working against their own monetary interests, but with their values of more fairness for everyone. No one is getting rich off of abortion. But I’m not surprised at all that right wing talking talking points would try to make it seem like that’s the case. And I am unfortunately not surprised that a lot of right wingers swallow the lies.

  11. I know you said it’s once a week you check or answer which is fine. I’m sorry it’s been tough on your eyes. I just wanted to say, ignore the long post I had. I had a newer on I put up which is short to respond to instead when you get the chance.I just wanted to add that incase you thought the newer post was an additional read to the longer one, which it is not. I wrote again and just had it for your thoughts and then said I’d respond after. My older first posts had my thoughts which I ended up writing a lot or more than I initially anticipated. What happens with me is once my thoughts get going, I just have to much to say.

    • OK. I will read the newest post.

      Meanwhile I do have to approve a bunch of student comments for a class where the students are required to do 200 word responses. So it could be a while before I Read something that isn’t required for class.

      • ok my bad. Your students are doing 200 word responses to your blog posts? Is it for this specific one or other ones from your blogpost site?

      • That’s cool, so they look through your blogpost and get to choose which one to comment too? Or you choose for them? Have you done this before? I know you’ve had students many times comment on here, but I didn’t know if you’ve had assignments before for them to comment on them.

      • They can comment on anything on the blog, even from years ago. It helps them to learn, helps me to see what they are not learning, and I get a writing sample. And apparently when you write on a public blog people tend to Better develop their writing skills a bit more.

  12. I do see and believe in the hypocritical statements of men, especially those in high political power in the topic of abortion. What does surprise me is that although the amount of unconsented sexual acts down on women by men, there are those who have even participated on these evil acts, still say they don’t associate with the idea of abortion, but to prevent having a future and potential child, they aggressively force their partners to have an abortion. If these men were truly about anti-abortion, then they would practice sexual activities using protection. The idea of having an abortion, is very controversial in the modern society we live in, many believe that it is considered murder to have an abortion because you are killing a fetal baby, but many argue, what happens if you are raped and impregnated, how can you keep the child of the man that has taken advantage over you. Personally, I believe that abortion should be allowed, but in a certain time period after the female is diagnosed with being pregnant, I believe the time frame should be roughly 1 month after you are pregnant, because at that point, you are in the early stages of development, and also there should be a valid reason as to why you want an abortion. Reasons being you have been raped, or something else very personal and sensitive to you. But going back to the topic, how can we allow these politician males to be the ones representing our nation of “freedom”, when all they really believe in is gaining power to fit their needs, and the freedom of males. In order to fight against this corrupt system, us as those who care about the safety and wellness of not only women, but everyone in America, we all should band together and stop these certain individuals from succeeding in their plans.

    • Yeah, it’s really about freedom for the powerful, not freedom for everyone. If those who are more powerless are harmed and miserable apparently that’s OK. So long as the powerful can do whatever they want

  13. “He has clearly lied about things and yet he should be on the Supreme Court? That’s crazy. And there is plenty of evidence that he sexually assaulted someone. No one like that should be on the Supreme Court.”

    Well, I did not hear the lies you are referring. A man (or woman) should not be judged on their behavior in high school. Judge Kavanaugh has a better track record for his treatment and support of women than even a lot the male feminists.

    His daughters should be very proud of their father. He demonstrated to them what a REAL man looks like and stands for in life. He was a true fighter. He would not roll over for the likes of these whinny male feminists like Chuck Schumer and Cory Booker.

    I was in awe of the great speech made by Senator Collins. Senator Collins used logic, reason, and fairness in evaluating Judge Kavanaugh. She is no right wing Republican. She has a record of voting to defend women in the Senate. I know she has consistently voted to keep federal funding for Planned Parenthood. Of course now she is a “fake feminist” according to the angry mob of the Left. Sigh.

    Real men and strong women (Senator Collins) stand firm in their beliefs. They stand on principle and will not be bullied. They eschew all the emotion. They rely on logic and reason.

    I keep coming back to one Keith Ellison. Why has the Left ignored his issue? Why don’t they believe his girlfriend? Is it not the view of the Left that ALL women should be believed? Or is it because the female accuser is NOT a white woman? I will tell you why Keith Ellison is getting a free pass from Democrat leadership and the Left. He is Black AND he is a Muslim. Democrat leadership is terrified of offending these protected groups. That is the outcome of identity politics.

    I am convinced that the silent majority will prevail in America. Liberty, freedom of speech, and respect for individual rights will prevail in the end. Group think and identity politics will not ruin our great nation.

    God Bless America!

    • I think Keith Ellison should get the same treatment as any Republican.

      The Republicans were under tremendous pressure from their a billionaire donors to get a supreme court nominee confirmed who will do everything he can – and who has a record – of ruling in favor of corporate elites and against working people. That is why Susan Collins managed to find an excuse to support him. She is good at dressing up a vote as being moderate when it turns out not to be. She voted for Repeal of the affordable care act by saying that she wanted something done to bolster medical care for ordinary Americans, and said she was confident the Republicans would do that. But then they didn’t. And her SCOTUS speech she said she was confident that Justice Kavanaugh would be moderate. So far he has already voted against voting rights for all Americans. Every now and then she has supported things like family planning but she also has a history of supporting the powerful over the more powerless members of society, whether it is corporate elites over workers Or billionaire interests over healthcare for ordinary Americans, or billionaire interests over the tax interest of ordinary Americans etc.

  14. These men embody and perpetuate the exact thing that many of them try to deny exist, and you have said it simply and beautifully, “In such a world women have no freedom over their bodies but men have complete freedom to do whatever they will. Men get what they want. Women pay the price. It all sustains patriarchy.”

    What kind of message are we sending to our nation’s youth when we are time and time again refusing to hold our male elected officials accountable for their contradictory words and actions? I say male because a certain Ms. Clinton didn’t seem to receive this same leeway and unspoken understanding when facing her previous wrongdoings. Well, obviously because ‘boys will be boys’, but women should know better!

    In regards to Mr. Kavanaugh, I am very saddened, but ultimately not surprised, by the unwavering support from so many of our nations men and women even before any “investigation” *insert eye roll* even took place. The unfortunate reality is that when we have a president who has escaped responsibility for his own heinous crimes against women, this now becomes accepted and lessened from the atrocity it is to merely a mindless act ‘every high school boy can relate to’.

    I look forward to the women and men who will lead by example and be a voice of empowerment and hope for our nation’s future.

    • I look forward to a future of greater partnership and respect for all.

    • “In regards to Mr. Kavanaugh, I am very saddened, but ultimately not surprised, by the unwavering support from so many of our nations men and women even before any “investigation” *insert eye roll* even took place.”

      Just because a woman makes an allegation does NOT mean it is true!!!! It’s like you want to hang a man without due process. That is wrong. That is un-American. We MUST consider facts and evidence.

      It was a woman, Sen. Susan Collins who provided the most reasoned and logical approach to evaluate Judge Kavanaugh. It was fair!!!

      Personally, what a man or woman does while in high school should NOT be considered in evaluating their life as adults.

      • Well, her story seems more credible. She was willing to take a lie detector test and he wasn’t. Even his calendar fit her side of the story better than his. And he was shown to lie in small ways, suggesting he would lie in big ways. Not the best for a supreme court justice.

        Whether or not something should count against you that you did when you were young depends on what it is, it seems to me. Someone who is willing to be so hurtful as to sexually assault someone and laugh about it isn’t fit for the supreme court. It’s not like he’s the only conservative possible. And it’s not like he would end up in jail, in which case a presumption of innocence is vital. But when it comes to a job interview it’s not so important to assume innocence until proven guilty. A lot of companies check peoples Facebook/ social media to figure out whether to hire them. The people wouldn’t go to jail but you can see that they’re not the sort of person you would want to hire.

  15. I saw this because it became a viral tweet and made it’s way on Good morning america, yahoo and even BBC. I have mixed feelings, I wrote a bunch but it was long winded. I figured I’d let you answer first and share my thoughts and I can get all my thoughts which would be shorter by replying back and forth with you

    “What would you do if all men had a 9pm curfew?”

    Dudes: Read the replies and pay attention.

    #metoo #Kavanaugh #Cosby #feminism #maleprivilege #privilege

    Here;s the persons’s twitter page

    And Good morning america page talking about this and the issues.

    • That’s a fascinating question. The point, is of course, isn’t that we should actually make a law with a 9 PM curfew for men. But as a thought experiment I am fascinated by how safe in the world I suddenly feel. I would feel free to do pretty much anything I wanted in a way that I do not now.

      • I know that’s not the point, and to bring home the point of things. I have tons of empathy for women, so that’s why it’s conflicting. It bothers me for a couple reasons. Why things aren’t better for women to feel safer and the things women go through or have to think about with cat calls, sexual harassment, at the bar at night, rape and how women can be targeted for stuff like that. And how women are more vulnerable just because of men being bigger and stronger. So yes, I get that. With saying all that. Just like the point isn’t about there being a curfew, plus it wouldn’t even work because criminals don’t follow rules to begin, But what was annoying about that tweet was how it generalized men. And also, it was just to ladies. Yes women are more vulnerable and have more fears and such. But to have a tweet and question just to women, dismisses male victims, like that matters less.

        Kind of like the videos I posted in the other blogpost. Like the tweet could’ve been if bad men had a curfew at 9pm. The question some may ask is how do you tell that? Or enforce that? . Well you can’t enforce a curfew with men anyway, so if we’re going make believe, we might as well go that way. I would be more comfortable and do things at night too as a man. It’s not even a bad neighborhood, but even as a man I’ve had nights going to my car alone where i’m a bit on guard where a group of guys are walking by and like just one light out in the city so dark out and feeling I would be quite vulnerable to being robbed or mugged right now.

      • Many men die from strangers too. Yes they are from other men, but I’m glad this was to just women. And I saw these tweets and responses and women saying all these things of what they would do. I felt bad women had to feel they couldn’t, but it;s not like guys, well only stupid guys go walking and feel invincible. I mean if that were the case, there wouldn’t be so many law abiding men who carry a gun on them. Not because they are criminals but for self defense. It was just upsetting seeing the answers from the women, with the generalized tweet to men, which kind of felt sexist. But how completely safe they now would be, beause they would be amongst their angelic sex, other women at night. Yes I know the stats. But there’s many reasons for that. Stats show black men commitiing more crime than white men and that;s systemic and societal reasons, not inherent. And I’m sure people would find it racist if there was a tweet of BLACK men having a curfew at 9pm, but for some reason a tweet about men was fine and not sexist. It doesn’t matter if it wasn’t meant for all men. It still means, like the tweet was how women are better than men morally. I’ve seen it from otherwise liberal men, I’m not liberal, and have the same empathy so having mixed feelings. But it still rubbed them the wrong way which it did for me too.

        Interesting thing is the person who started that viral tweet is still a man. A transsexual, born male. I wonder if said persons hate for their own sex caused him/her to transition. I find that hypocritical. Throwing shade at men, like person is a different sex or not bashing themselves because of operations. Still a dude, I’m pretty sure still has y chromosomes, adam’s apple and twig and berries, He/she can gtfo as far as I’m concerned, with such sexist shit. I wonder how well a tweet would go even if statistics backed something about women that was negative that was more done by women than men and such a tweet was viral at women? I think there would be a huge sexist uproarm but it;s fine if it’s at men…..

      • Hey Bob, this inspired a post. It’s coming on Monday. I’ll be curious to hear your thoughts.

      • OK let’s try the male curfew thought experiment. All the law abiding men stay at home, and all the lawless men are out roaming the streets. Do you feel safer now? I’ve seen videos of Swedish female police trying to arrest men, and its rather funny.

        Anyway, weren’t you trying to convince us all the gender is a social construct and that men and women are basically the same? If that’s true, how is this a thing?

        And furthermore, if feminists are serious that they are aiming for equality and not supremacy, why are we continually seeing feminist thought drifting into female supremacy with thought experiments like this? A man and woman disagree on what happened 35 years ago? #BelieveWomen. Men want to gather together to discuss male issues like suicide? They have to be shut down by feminists. Women make up most graduates? Not good enough, they still need affirmative action. Feminists have become tyrannical and totalitarian and it needs to stop.

      • let’s try the male curfew thought experiment. All the law abiding men stay at home, and all the lawless men are out roaming the streets. Do you feel safer now?

        I don’t get this. Of course not. But then toxic masculinity is on the loose and good masculinity is walked away at home. If you had reversed it and toxic masculinity had a 9 PM curfew and good man we’re all out outside I would feel completely safe.

        Women police officers have no trouble Arestin man if they are using guns. But women police officers are especially effective at community policing, more effective than men because the community is more likely to trust them.

        To your other points it’s not that women are better than men, it’s that we socialize girls to be nicer than men. We could change male socialization to Encourage more positive masculinity. Look at our founding fathers. They were socialized to be good men.

      • To go with what I wrote too. I guess it’s different living in a big city, but I wonder with some women who tweeted in response to that viral question where they said they would or could shop late at night or grocery shop if that was more women in big cities. I never thought of that because I’ve come from a pretty decent small city. And I had to get stuff last night. I waited forever, but went at 11pm at Wegman’s grocery store. And it’s just in general obviously not busy at that time and fairly quiet, but the parking lots are very well lit and still enough cars where you’re like walking without people coming in and out. But while there wasn’t a lot of people shopping. The ratio of men and women there was fairly even, even though it was 11pm. younger girls, older women, some with kids, even though Idk why they had their kids still up that late, but not my problem ha. But I wondered, maybe that’s less or less likely women shopping at that time of night in the big cities because feel less safe? I’ve been in bigger cities visiting or on vacation or a night out. But never lived in a big city. I like the small city, country, small townish like places more with living. Big cities can be fun for a night out, but I like the low key living otherwise. So much less stressful driving in a small city than big city too. And less impatient, aggressive drivers.

      • Sounds like you live in a pretty safe community where people feel safe. You’re lucky!

  16. Sorry to hear you are having medical issues with your eyes. I hope the therapy works.

    Yes, I know my reply was long. Sorry.

    This will be very short. We have to simply agree to disagree. I see things much differently than you.

    Get well wishes to you.


  17. There seems to be one constant with men in power, hypocrisy. Your quote “Or they are anti-abortion until they want their partners to get one.” rings true, over and over again with these guys… But, good news is more & more we the people can call them out on their BS and make change (as tiny as those changes end of being).

    • I’m hopeful. But we’ll see. The Koch brothers are so desperate to get a Scotus appointment who will favor the wealthy above everyone else that they might just push the nomination through via a GOP that is dependent on their $$$$ donations.

  18. Sigh..

    This matter with Kavanaugh is a pack of lies. Pure and simple.

    This is all done to try to derail his nomination. IT WILL NOT WORK!!

    Most of the women who are married have husbands who when they were young tried to get laid by being a bit aggressive. Now, due to “MeToo” this behavior is called sexual assault. Absurd.

    MeToo it self is hypocrisy. Might I remind you of this woman Argento who had sex with the under age teen? Or Keith Ellison of the DNC? Where is the outrage on the Left? Oh I forgot…when a woman has sex with ANY one, it is a gift to the man. The underage boy should be happy. Right?

    I don’t believe this woman one bit. It is all political.

    Democrats cannot win elections so they try to use the courts to make laws. The is what Congress is for the last time I checked.

    STDs are on the rise in America. It is not because men are not using condoms. Women are voluntarily asking us men NOT to use them as well. Don’t blame us men!!

    As usual it is patriarchy and men..blah blah blah. Feminism is hatred of men. It is not about equality any more. It seeks domination OVER us men.

    Btw, it IS a crime to lie to Congress if you are testifying under oath.

    • If I didn’t have long experience with you reading my blog I would probably think this was trolling and I would not respond. But because I have seen some semblance of heart in you I will respond. Although I wanted to take some time before doing so.

      “Most women who are married have husbands who when they were young tried to get laid by being a bit aggressive.“

      That is a more common belief among men who have tendencies toward rape. That is not all men. And it’s very important that men understand that aggressive sex is sexual assault.

      You seem to have no idea how harmful it is. I don’t know if you listened to Dr. Fords testimony but did you see the trauma it caused her? I recently saw the movie “eighth grade” with some friends of mine and the worst thing that happened was when a young girl — out of naïveté – found herself alone in a car with an older boy. All of us were freaked out, worried that he would hurt her. He didn’t. But it brought back scary memories for some of us. That alone was enough to freak us out.

      How can you possibly think that it would be OK for two 17-year-olds to trap a 15-year-old in a bedroom, one of them throws her on the bed and covers her mouth and starts to try to undress her.

      You have no idea what it would be like to be a woman in that situation. I wish you would try to imagine what that might be like. And apparently you have no idea what it’s like to tell anyone, given the hate that women who have been sexually assaulted get, while the perpetrators get all the empathy, as you and others have demonstrated.

      • Yesterday I watched the ENTIRE hearing.

        Here are my observations:

        1) I thought Dr. Ford’s testimony was semi credulous. Why? One she could NOT recall dates, times, location etc. Second, the people whom she stated were present have refuted her claims. Lastly, she stated she never knew they could come to CA. However, she admitted she was in Delaware the whole time.

        2) We MUST favor evidence over emotion. The preponderance of evidence clearly favor Judge Kavanaugh. I am not interested in emotion. I am interested in facts and evidence.

        3) This entire hearing has been a circus orchestrated by Democrats. From day one, even BEFORE President Trump selected a nominee, there was opposition. No matter whom appointed, the Democrats were going to oppose that person.

        What you and other women want is for ALL women to be believed regardless of the facts and evidence. That is wrong. That is also un-American.

        Dr. Ford presented her side. Judge Kavanaugh presented his side. I believe Judge Kavanaugh over Dr. Ford due to the evidence.

        The Left has just gone overboard in this country since Trump was elected. You simply cannot get over the defeat. I have attended three Presidential Inaugurations (Reagan, Clinton, Obama). These were times when Americans put aside their political differences. Yet, in 2017 you saw cars overturned, building vandalized, and other extreme acts. . Yet when Obama defeated McCain and Romney, you saw no such behavior on the part of people on the Right.

        I am just tired of all the emotion. I am tired of all the screaming and yelling. I am tired of all the outrage over petty things. I am tired of the gender and race politics.

        Our country is built on the notion that the individual is supreme. Yet the Left is all about group politics. If anyone expresses a different opinion, he or she is deemed a racist, sexist, homophobe, Islamaphobe, xenophobe…etc. I am just sick of it all. Most Americans (who are the silent majority) are also sick of this nonsense.

        Our country has become increasingly feminized in its behavior. . Men cannot be men any longer. Everything has to appeal to emotion. Logic, facts, reason no longer matter. Such a society is on the road to hell in my opinion.

        In my personal opinion what a person did in High School should NOT be a factor in judging their adult life. Judge Kavanaugh has nearly a 100 women whom he has worked with or befriended who have spoken out in his defense. Those are facts. That is evidence of who he is as a man. But, when you are guided by emotion and/or you have a political ax to grind, you ignore this.

        The #MeToo movement has been weaponized to go after men and silence men. Sexual assault is very wrong. Our country now hate White, Christian, heterosexual men. It really is ALL men. We Black men are the next targets for White liberals.

        Back to the sexual assault issue.

        I am NOT making light of sexual assault. I like nearly all men believe the accusations should be taken seriously. However, that does NOT mean the woman is to be believed 100% always. Look at the Duke lacrosse team. Clearly after examining the evidence (witnesses) such allegations were proved false. There are numerous other cases where men have been falsely accused. Look at the comedian (cannot recall his name) who had a young woman accuse him of sexual misconduct over a bad night of sex.

        It seems that women and their male feminist supporters want people to just accept that the woman is truthful AND ignore all evidence to the contrary. Yet these same people are silent on Keith Ellison and Ms. Argento.

        I can recall 30 years ago when teens would fool around. It was not uncommon for the boy to “feel up” the girl. That is now considered sexual assault. Yet, if you are a guy and a girl (or woman) grabs you hard cock through your pants it is OK. Only men are targeted.

        Lastly, I know from my volunteer work in women’s homeless shelters that what occurs to a young girl can impact her for a lifetime as a woman. I know this for a fact. Research also clearly show this to be the case. All of this is based on facts and evidence and NOT emotion.

      • Hi Huggy. First, as I told Bob:

        I’m sorry that it takes me a while to respond to comments. Especially long ones. I’m still working on healing my eyes, which got very strained between writing three blog posts a week, responding to comments, and trying to write a book, and other computer work. So I have vastly cut down the amount of time I spend on the computer. And I’m doing physical therapy for my eyes, which mostly consists of stretching them. They are getting better! But I will probably be responding only about once a week for a while, at least to long comments.

        Regarding your comment:

        You have to consider how memory works when someone is traumatized. They remember the trauma — which is seared in the brain — but they don’t remember all the details of the surrounding circumstance. How many details do you remember high school parties?

        Overall I found her testimony to hold water much better than his. Even his calendar (Who keeps a calendar from 1982!?) Supports her testimony more than his own.

        I used to wonder why women didn’t report sexual assault. I’d heard the theories but this was the first time I was able to see firsthand what happens: the victim is shredded to pieces and people support the victimizer. And it happens with male victims too. Incredibly sad.

        Also, while I believe in innocent until proven guilty when it comes to sending someone to prison I have a higher standard for putting someone on the Supreme Court. He has clearly lied about things and yet he should be on the Supreme Court? That’s crazy. And there is plenty of evidence that he sexually assaulted someone. No one like that should be on the Supreme Court.

        And outrage at the process makes no sense given what the Republicans did to Merrick Garland.

        Otherwise, I don’t understand why so many working people support this nomination. Economic elites are trying hard to make it difficult for billionaires to have to pay taxes to support things like Social Security, Medicare, Medicaid, unemployment compensation… As soon as the tax bill was passed with 83% of the benefit going to the top 1% several members of Congress (who depend on billionaire donors) began insisting that now we will have to cut social security and Medicare. Paul Ryan, Orin Hatch, Tom Cole are a few are a few I personally heard.

        And these billionaires are desperate to have a Supreme Court that will bind Congress from creating legislation that helps the middle class if it means taxes to support Social Security, Medicare etc. If you look at what the Trump administration has done they are constantly acting in ways that support the moneyed elite and hurt the rest of us. Trump just passed something making it easier to expose workers to dangerous conditions like radiation so that corporate executives can make more money. Judge Kavanaugh has a long history of ruling for elite corporate interests and against workers.

        If these billionaire donors ever get what they want the economy will collapse. Especially since automation and globalization are taking so many jobs. Plus pressure the put on Congress to bust unions and keep the minimum wage low. All of it leaving the middle class with little money in their pockets.

        But then they use racism and sexism to distract people from the real cause of their problems. As if Mexicans and black people and women are taking jobs from white men when the real problem is a massive redistribution of wealth from the middle-class to the top 1%. But because so many people are racist and sexist the distraction totally works. The people of our country will be much worse off.

        The billionaires want everything to be about individual freedom rather than collective action and collective good because if you don’t have collective action the wealthy win. The wealthy elite beat workers who can’t organize, for instance. Unionbusting, lack of a decent wage and poor working conditions. That’s the main issue for these billionaires. Just watch what happens to working peoples living standards over the next few years if conservatives stay in power.

        You also don’t seem to understand feminism. You have some stereotypes about it. But I’m glad you’ve done volunteer work at women’s homeless shelters.

      • This may make sense to you but it doesn’t make sense to me.

        Women can make a lot of money by acting as anti-feminists. Just as racial minorities can make money and/or gain status by arguing against antiracism. Witness Clarence Thomas.

        I don’t find either convincing.

  19. My view has always been if a woman wants to use contraception or have an abortion, that it is her body and her business, nobody else’s.

    • Me too.

      for many years I was actually against abortion until I realized a number of things.

      Laws against it don’t stop it, they just drive it underground and women die.

      But I also started noticing that the people who were “Pro life“ were also commonly against things that help people live: Obamacare, Medicaid, prenatal care for poor women, food stamps, pollution controls, gun controls.

      They didn’t seem to be pro-life so much as against women’s agency. Trying to prevent abortion is trying to prevent women from having freedom over their own bodies, freedom over their own finances (if women are forced to give birth it is harder to have a job), etc.

      I could go on!

      • “But I also started noticing that the people who were “Pro life“ were also commonly against things that help people live: Obamacare, Medicaid, prenatal care for poor women, food stamps, pollution controls, gun controls.”

        All these things are the welfare state. Where has the welfare state got us? 77% of black children are born to single mothers. This ultimately leads to all the social ills like massive crime rates, massive unemployment rates, children and mothers living in poverty and so forth. This didn’t happen when there was no welfare state. Women took responsibility for themselves because they knew they couldn’t substitute the state for a husband. Now they are totally irresponsible, and who pays the price? The children.

        You’ve got to be cruel to be kind. Democrats are still keeping them as voting slaves, just like olden times, by teaching them how to not take responsibility for themselves. This has led to the total breakdown of the family. This nonsense happened to me. My 13 year old daughter didn’t like being told to clean her room and go to school. So she went to the state and told them some nonsense story about how I was mean to her. They said oh dear, there there, let me give you a free home and free money. Later on she had a child to some loser who rapidly vanished, and now she gets endless free accommodation and free money. The welfare state is vandalism against normal human and family relations.

      • The welfare state isn’t what caused the problem in the black community. Lack of economic empowerment, backed by discrimination is what caused the problem.

        Today you are finding white people suffering economically as we face a massive redistribution of wealth from the middle class to the top 1% (via outsourcing, offshoreing, union-busting, failing to raise the minimum-wage and automation, for instance. With this economic insecurity the white Working class is beginning to look very much like the black experience.

        If we continue on this road without any social support our economy will collapse as working people lose their jobs.

  20. Why should the rich and powerful abide by the rules they make for the rest of us? That defeats the purpose of being rich and powerful, which is to indulge your every whim.

  21. Racism, patriarchy, gender bias have been practiced for 1000s of years, that will be difficult to change soon. The individual mindset is needed to be changed for the old, putrid, rancid culture to change. Until then, “Men get what they want. Women pay the price.”

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