Blog Archives

My Son Wants to Be Snow White for Halloween

Defying gender norms for Halloween

Defying gender norms for Halloween

One day early last fall, I returned from work and discovered my son in a dress. And not just any dress. A Snow White dress. I can’t say it was a complete shock. Luke had been telling my wife and me for more than a week that he wanted to be Snow White for Halloween. Whenever Melanie or I gently suggested an alternate costume, he would calmly respond, “No, I think I have to be Snow White. I dropped my bag and made what I hoped was a suitable fuss over the costume. My face still taut with manufactured glee.

Read the rest of this entry

Women, Objects of Desire (Even for Women?)

Women bombarded by Victoria's Secret models

Women bombarded by Victoria’s Secret models

Sexy lady’s bodies have been the focus of pop culture for decades.

Maybe that’s why even straight women were more aroused by a nude woman than by a nude man in one study, when measuring blood flow to the vagina. Some research suggests culture may be playing a role.

Is this true? A student of mine wondered.  Read the rest of this entry

A Girl Who Was Raised Like A Boy

Sondos, as a little girl.

S. as a little girl.

By S. Abu-Coush

Men are men and women are women?

We don’t learn to be. We just are?

But I didn’t learn gender the way most girls do. And even less the way most Middle Eastern girls do.

And I don’t see myself the way most girls do, either. Read the rest of this entry

Must Sexual Orientation Be Biological?

Cynthia Nixon of Sex and the City fame announced that she chose to be gay. And she caught hell.

I gave a speech recently, an empowerment speech to a gay audience, and it included the line ‘I’ve been straight and I’ve been gay, and gay is better.’ And they tried to get me to change it, because they said it implies that homosexuality can be a choice. And for me, it is a choice. I understand that for many people it’s not, but for me it’s a choice, and you don’t get to define my gayness for me.

Some critics insist she is a biologically-based bisexual.

Others come to her defense. Read the rest of this entry

Gay Marriage Protects Marriage

The rainbow White House

The rainbow White House

Mamma, don’t let your daughters grow up to marry gay cowboys.

That’s from a headline I once saw.

You could reverse that:

Mamma, don’t let your gay sons grow up to marry girls.

I get that. Because some of my friends have tried it. Except for the cowboy part. Read the rest of this entry

Omar Mateen, Homophobic Homosexual? (Too unhappy to be gay)

Victims of shooting at Pulse, a gay nightclub in Orlando, Florida.

Victims of shooting at Pulse, a gay nightclub in Orlando, Florida.

Some wonder: Is Omar Mateen, who massacred gay men at a nightclub, a homophobic homosexual (too unhappy to be gay)?

I recently posted on a study showing that straight men who aren’t homophobic don’t get too aroused by gay porn.  Read the rest of this entry

Homophobic Homosexuals (too unhappy to be gay)

Homophobia 2These homosexuals, they’ll trick ya. They’ll find out what kind of music ya like, what candy ya like, then they’ll invite you down to their house.

That’s what Tina Fey’s high school health teacher had warned her class about. Read the rest of this entry

Religious Liberty Trampling Other Liberties

Only women who are nuns get religious liberty?

Only women who are nuns get religious liberty?

Some folks try to use their own religious rights to tramp down everyone else’s.

A couple examples:

  • Contraception: Powerful people who don’t believe in birth control refuse to cover contraception thru their organization’s insurance
  • Gay marriage: No cake-baking for gay weddings if you’re against homosexuality

Apparently, religious rights are more important than any other kind. Read the rest of this entry

Homophobes Aroused by Gay Porn

Homophobia 2You’d think homophobic men would be the least likely to get aroused by homoerotic images.

Think again.

Researchers at the University of Georgia surveyed young men on the degree of homophobia they felt, as measured by their self-described levels of aversion to gay men, and specifically, the intensity of “dread” they experienced interacting with them. Read the rest of this entry

Sexual Fluidity & Emotional Connection

Sexual Fluidity by Lisa Diamond

Sexual Fluidity by Lisa Diamond

Women seem to be more sexually fluid than men. Why?

One reason might involve the way we tie sex and emotional connection together for women.

Not to mention that women are more likely to become deeply connected to same sex friends. Read the rest of this entry

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