Can Friends Survive Friends w/Benefits?
Sometimes friendships between women and men turn into “friends with benefits.”
Not surprising, really.
Friendships between men and women often start when one of the two – usually the guy – is hoping for sex.
Or sex is wanted without the baggage that relationships can bring, and FWB seems more inviting than hookups with strangers — especially for girls who want to avoid being called sluts.
Still, many fret that if things don’t work out, FWB could bring the loss of their friend. To keep things platonic, many avoid discussing the relationship, and make sure to bring up romances with others. And no flirting.
Still, the line is crossed at some point in the lives of about 60% of college students. What happens next?
80%-90% of the time FWB sex doesn’t grow into romance. Maybe the sex wasn’t as great as hoped. Or it worked at first and then faded. Or only one person fell in love. Or one person fell in love with someone else.
So what happens when the sex stops? Does the friendship end, too?
Turns out, as often as not, the couple feels even closer than they had before. That’s what a University of Louisville, Kentucky study found. About 80% of ex-FWBs kept the friendship even without the benefit.
However they end, it seems that once the erotic aspect has been exhausted, many don’t find it particularly hard to return to being just friends. The shared history, the emotional intimacy, the mutual liking are all still there.
Where friends are lost, there typically wasn’t a real friendship to start. The FWB was more sex-based. And one partner often felt deceived.
So if you were actually friends before, you’re likely to be friends after. And maybe even closer.
Posted on April 7, 2014, in men, psychology, relationships, sex and sexuality, women and tagged friends with benefits, FWB, men, psychology, relationships, sex and sexuality, women. Bookmark the permalink. 44 Comments.