Flaunting It: Damned if Do, Don’t
Last night, as we sometimes do, our family sat around the dining table and looked through the summer’s social media photos.
We have teenage sons, and so naturally there are quite a few pictures of you lovely ladies to wade through. Wow – you sure took a bunch of selfies in your skimpy pj’s this summer!
I get it – you’re in your room, so you’re heading to bed, right? But then I can’t help but notice the red carpet pose, the extra-arched back, and the sultry pout. What’s up? None of these positions is one I naturally assume before sleep.
That post doesn’t reflect who you are at all! We think you are lovely and interesting, and usually very smart. But, we had to cringe and wonder what you were trying to do?
Girls, if you think you’ve made an on-line mistake (we all do), RUN to your accounts and take down the selfies that makes it too easy for friends to see you in only one dimension.
You are growing into a real beauty, inside and out.
Act like her, speak like her, post like her.
Kyoto Redbird is a college-educated 20-something who finds navigating around a contradictory — and too often hostile — view of women difficult and frustrating.
This is a TERRIBLE burden to place on young girls, who are, for all their breasts, bralessness, and pouty lips, still children. Children raging with hormones and confusion and the need to be accepted.
And saying “boys will be boys” but girls should know better is terribly unfair and irresponsible.
It’s why a judge handed down a 30-day sentence to a rapist because his 14-year-old victim “acted older than her age.” It’s why a group of boys can sexually assault an intoxicated girl at a party, take pictures, and get little to no punishment. It’s why teen pregnancy prevention is focused on girls and not boys.
And, boys are capable of giving girls respect and proper treatment, no matter how they dress, she says.
Sadly, whether the contradictory prescription is covering or strutting your stuff, a girls’ worth is too often body-centered.
I agree that it’s best for young women to present their multidimensional selves, and not become mere sex objects. I also believe that boys and men can, and often do, see women as more than their bodies. But more than blaming boys or girls, society needs to change and stop promoting such crappy messages.
Posted on October 2, 2013, in body image, feminism, gender, objectification, psychology, sexism, women and tagged body image, feminism, gender, objectification, psychology, sexism, women. Bookmark the permalink. 37 Comments.