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My Polyamory Journey

Polyamory 1By William Albert Baldwin

A few weeks ago, a woman invited me to her apartment, then proceeded to interview me for the role of her boyfriend/
lover/escort.

Since I write about polyamorous relationships and since I list myself as “in an open relationship” on Facebook, she figured I must be “available.”

Besides, I’m a guy; aren’t guys always ready for a willing woman?

In short: No. Read the rest of this entry

My Bumpy Trek: From Tomboy to Sex Object to Me

Bullying pretty girls

Bullying pretty girls

By KEG

As a little girl I wanted to be a boy. As a teen I wanted to be a Cosmo Girl.

I got punished either way.

Sometimes so badly that I stopped eating and started hiding and cutting.

Many scrapes and bruises later, I’m glad to be me. Read the rest of this entry

Guys and Dolls (Literally)

Guys will do anything for the dolls they love, declare Nicely and Benny in the musical, “Guys and Dolls.”

But the video below suggests guys may someday do anything TO the dolls they love. Literal, robotic ones.

I wonder how satisfying it will be. Read the rest of this entry

When Sex = Disempowerment 

Leaking selfies

Leaking selfies

Guys post stolen nude photos of famous celebs online, and it’s all about sex, right?

Men stare at women walking down the street. That’s all about sex, too.

Or, a woman is blamed for an attack because a guy can’t resist exposed cleavage — or a bit of hair that has fallen loose from a Saudi veil.

Actually, a lot of things that look like sex are really about power.  Read the rest of this entry

Once Was, Virgins Had A Lot of Sex 

Daddy-Daughter Purity Ball

Daddy-Daughter Purity Ball

In its original meaning, virginity had nothing to do with sex.

Virgins were women who took ownership of themselves.

They were autonomous, complete and holding status in their own right — not bound to any man. So virgins could have a lot of sex, if they wanted to.  Read the rest of this entry

Yes means Yes: Consent is Sexy

consent is sexySuppose someone you know slightly arrives at your home, baggage and all, and just barges in and stays overnight. When you protest, the response is, “Well, you didn’t say no.”

Or imagine that a man breaks into your home while you sleep off a night of drunken revelry, and robs you blind. Did your drinking imply consent?

No.

Yet a lot of people think it’s okay to enter a woman’s body when she hasn’t said she would like that.  Read the rest of this entry

Be… But Don’t Be… Pretty, Girly, Sexy

The sexual double-bind: damned if you do, damned if you don't.

The sexual double-bind: damned if you do, damned if you don’t.

By Caitie Adler

In my kindergarten mind girls were beautiful and boys were tough. And since girls were beautiful, I was beautiful.

By middle school things looked a lot more complicated.

I’d learned that girls should be pretty. And I tried to be. But there was a downside.  Read the rest of this entry

Sex Is Best When She Likes It

When Sally faked it

When Sally faked it

By “Sex Ain’t No Game

It’s hard to have a sexual relationship with someone who won’t accept the concept of mutual pleasure.

Here’s an anecdote containing way too much information:

Considering the tools my current girlfriend and I have, and how fit we are, sex should be easy for both of us to enjoy. And when we began the sexual part of our relationship — both of us being fairly new to it — we learned what the other liked fast.

But it changed a few months back.

It seems she’s done research in pornography, and for the past couple of months she does things she thinks girls do all the time during sex. Like incredibly loud moaning from the second we start making out. It starts abruptly, so it doesn’t seem like a natural progression.

Long story short, she ignores her own desire and focuses on mine.  Read the rest of this entry

When We Don’t Teach Boys About Sex

A shaming sexual culture

A shaming sexual culture

By Jayson Gaddis @ The Good Men Project

To not teach children about the sacredness of their bodies and their sexuality is one of the CORE abandonments of our time. This post is about the mess we are in around male sexuality. I am here to name it and simply put it in the open for all of us to see.

I received ZERO training around sex or my body until age 34. None. Fortunately for me, I now have excellent mentors and friends who are helping me grow up my sexuality and dive into its headwaters with open arms. But it was almost too late. Read the rest of this entry

Nude Men Seem Less Intelligent

Justin Timberlake, showing some skin

Justin Timberlake, showing some skin

The more skin women reveal, the less men see them as intelligent or empowered.

Instead, nudity promotes the notion that women are sensitive, “feeling” creatures.

Turns out the perception runs both ways with women seeing men as less intelligent and less competent when they show skin, too. In fact, simply “taking off a sweater — or otherwise revealing flesh — can significantly change the way a mind is perceived” say researchers.

And as psychologist, Kurt Gray of the University of Maryland observed: Read the rest of this entry

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