Blog Archives

When We Don’t Teach Boys About Sex

A shaming sexual culture

A shaming sexual culture

By Jayson Gaddis @ The Good Men Project

To not teach children about the sacredness of their bodies and their sexuality is one of the CORE abandonments of our time. This post is about the mess we are in around male sexuality. I am here to name it and simply put it in the open for all of us to see.

I received ZERO training around sex or my body until age 34. None. Fortunately for me, I now have excellent mentors and friends who are helping me grow up my sexuality and dive into its headwaters with open arms. But it was almost too late. Read the rest of this entry

Nude Men Seem Less Intelligent

Justin Timberlake, showing some skin

Justin Timberlake, showing some skin

The more skin women reveal, the less men see them as intelligent or empowered.

Instead, nudity promotes the notion that women are sensitive, “feeling” creatures.

Turns out the perception runs both ways with women seeing men as less intelligent and less competent when they show skin, too. In fact, simply “taking off a sweater — or otherwise revealing flesh — can significantly change the way a mind is perceived” say researchers.

And as psychologist, Kurt Gray of the University of Maryland observed: Read the rest of this entry

Do better looking people have better personalities?

Beauty: Just skin deep

Beauty: Just skin deep

By Lisa Wade, PhD @ Sociological Images

Do better looking people have better personalities?

People seem to think so.

At one time OkCupid gave users the opportunity to rate each other twice: once for personality and once for looks.  The two were strikingly correlated. Read the rest of this entry

Men: More Likely to Separate Love & Sex?

sex v love

sex v love

Men are more likely than women to separate love and sex, right?

Men are more interested in no-strings sex, and they are less likely to be distressed the next day.

A while back a New York Times piece advocating open relationships discussed how it’s typically easier for gay men, compared with straight or lesbian couples, to open their relationships — for that reason.

But is it true?  Read the rest of this entry

Men Have Torpedos; Women Have “No-No’s”

A Rhetorische Torpedo

A Rhetorische Torpedo

By Raissa Mbassa

Have you ever thought about slang for our privates?

Some of my guy friends call theirs a “pocket rocket” or a “torpedo.”

Let’s see, a rocket is an incendiary weapon, while a torpedo is a tube-shaped bomb that’s fired underwater. Both cause tremendous destruction to whatever they’re aimed at.

It’s all painted in glorification. Victory. A magic stick of supernatural powers. A man’s best friend.  Read the rest of this entry

Guys Just Want One Thing

Guys want just one thing?Guys just want one thing.

The belief is so widespread that we needn’t say what the one thing is.

Yet the truism isn’t true.

You may have heard that since there are more women than men on college campuses these days, women are pressured to do sex the way men like it: No strings attached.  Read the rest of this entry

Red sex is for girls; Blue is for boys? 

Red sex, Blue sex

Red sex, Blue sex

When you think of red state sexuality, images of Bible believers saving themselves for marriage — or at least keeping their numbers down — may come to mind.

No wonder plenty of Southerners favor pastors and politicians who preach sex after marriage, abstinence education, no contraception, and shuttering Planned Parenthood.

And blue state sexuality? Full of “friends with benefits” and casual hookups, right?  Read the rest of this entry

His & Hers Objectification

Check out the side-by-side comparisons that show how strange it is when women and men get the same sex object treatment:

Women don’t seem to objectify men the way men do women.

It’s not that we’re any better. We just aren’t bombarded by a steady stream of sexualized and fetishized men and man-parts — that unconsciously seep into our brains. Thus, when men are turned into sex objects, it can look ridiculous.

But why’s objectification a problem? Read the rest of this entry

Men, Myths & Female Pleasure

Originally posted on Scott Williams:

Young Couple in Relationship Conflict

You understand how to fix your car. You can recite hockey stats like a scout. You understand renovations. You are good at your job. So why can’t you figure out a clitoris? The G-Spot? Do you really know if she’s faking it?

It is staggering the number of females in a longterm heterosexual marriage or relationship who tell me they rarely orgasm unless they do it themselves. The percentage is so high that I am nervous about how believable it would sound if I ventured a guess. The words, vast majority, have a truthful ring to them. Many women admit that they used to have more pleasure. Often women will tell me that their partner tries to pleasure them. More often than not, however, it’s tempting to just “lie back and dream of England”. So what is the big deal? Why is this so hard?

It really isn’t. It…

View original 476 more words

Men Using Sex To Gain Intimacy

Sex + Emotion

Sex + Emotion

By Jonathan Cadet

Women need intimacy to get to sex, they say. Well, it may be weak for a man to admit this, but we don’t have sex just for sex. A lot of us have sex because it’s one of the few ways we can express our emotions and gain intimacy.

I’d never thought about it until my women’s psych professor talked about how hard it is for men to express emotion.

But now I think it’s one reason why we seem to crave sex more than women do.  Read the rest of this entry

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