Objectifying Women Objectifies Men

Norah Vincent transforms into a man ("Ned") for 18 months.

Norah Vincent transforms into a man (“Ned”) for 18 months.

The four Fs. That’s all you need to know about women. Find ‘em. Feel ‘em. F- ‘em. Forget ‘em.

The only time 12-year-old Phil had a man-to-man chat with his dad, he got that advice. By the time he was a married 39-year-old professional with two daughters, he seemed to have absorbed the lesson: Read the rest of this entry

The Breast Fetish Is Natural? Afraid Not.

Got milk?

Got milk?

Science has shown that human females develop breasts as a secondary sexual characteristic that signals a woman is of age to reproduce. Breasts in other mammals only enlarge with pregnancy. And, female nipple stimulation lights up the same area of the brain as clitoral stimulation.

Comments like that come in response to this post: Men Aren’t Hard Wired To Find Breasts Attractive.

There, I argue that the breast fetish is socially constructed, and not biologically-based. Some readers tell me I’m wrong.

Here are their thoughts, and mine: Read the rest of this entry

The Islamic State Isn’t Islamic

Islamic peaceThe Islamic State is not Islamic.

Neither was Afghanistan under the Taliban, even though its leaders said they were striving to build, “the perfect Islamic state.”

Many will be surprised to learn that the Quran has very little sexism and gave women many rights that most women in the world did not enjoy in the 7th century, when the Quran was instituted.

In fact, most of the sexism you find in the Middle East comes from culture, not scripture.

The Quran gives women the right to: Read the rest of this entry

Shifting My Body Hatred To You

Bullying girls 2Girls bully girls for a variety of reasons.

Some are angry that other girls are more attractive than them, and seek to extinguish the threat.

Others want to lift themselves up by putting someone else down.

And some project their body hatred onto other women. And then attack. Read the rest of this entry

When Porn Makes Your Decisions

Hooked on porn

Hooked on porn

Pornographic images seem to activate a man’s visual system in a manner that goes beyond just looking at trees or even people. It’s almost like a high-definition signal compared with a standard signal.

That’s from William Struthers, Ph.D., a biopsychologist who wrote Wired for Intimacy.

He says the signal feels a lot like a drug. Some men call porn a “drug” and say it gives them a “rush” and makes them “high.” One man called it, “More mind altering than alcohol or any drug I’ve used.” Read the rest of this entry

Conservatives Want Less Inequality

Top 1% income versus the rest of us

Top 1% income versus the rest of us

Conservatives are starting to worry about income inequality. For real.

Well, at least some are:

The conservative IMF (International Monetary Fund) has warned:

Put simply, a severely skewed income distribution harms the pace and sustainability of growth over the longer term. It leads to an economy of exclusion, and a wasteland of discarded potential.

Read the rest of this entry

What Guys Won’t Admit

The Mask You Live In

The Mask You Live In

A guy sent me a link to a post called, “The One Thing All Men Feel, But Never Admit.”

He attached a note:

I can relate.

What is this thing that so many men feel but cannot say?  Read the rest of this entry

Men & Women React to Male & Female Nudity

Women and men showing skin

Women and men showing skin

By Lisa Wade @ Sociological Images

We’ve all heard the truism “sex sells.”

But whose sex is sold?  And to who?

If it was simply that sex sold,

…we’d see men and women equally sexually objectified in popular culture.  Instead, we see, primarily, women sold to (presumably heterosexual) men.  So what are we selling, exactly, if not “sex”?

Read the rest of this entry

How I’m Seen Differently in a Female Body

Joelle Circé, “Waving Pride”

Joelle Circé, “Waving Pride”

No aspect of my existence, no moment of the day, no contact, no arrangement, no response is not different for men and for women. The very tone of voice in which I was now addressed, the very posture of the person next in the line.

And if others’ responses shifted, so did my own. The more I was treated as a woman, the more woman I became. I adapted willy-nilly. If I was assumed to be incompetent at reversing cars, or opening bottles, oddly incompetent I found myself becoming. If the case was too heavy for me, inexplicably I found it so myself.

Women treated me with a frankness which was one of the happiest discoveries of my metamorphosis. But I also found men treating me more and more as junior. I discovered that even now men prefer women to be less informed, less able, less talkative, and certainly less self-centered than they are themselves; so I generally obliged.

Read the rest of this entry

Why Do I Care What Others Think?

Trumpeting our successes

Trumpeting our successes

Most people trumpet their successes and hide their failures.

When we win a race, a game, or an award, public recognition gives us a boost. We want to spread the word — and we hope that others will, too.

But when we fail at a project… or basic stair climbing… we hope no one sees the fall. And if they do, we hope they won’t gossip.

Rejection and humiliation make us think we’re no good.

But why do we care? Read the rest of this entry

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