Category Archives: violence against women

Yes means Yes: Consent is sexy

consent is sexySuppose someone you know slightly arrives at your home, baggage and all, and just barges in and stays overnight. When you protest, the response is, “Well, you didn’t say no.”

Or imagine that a man breaks into your home while you sleep off a night of drunken revelry, and robs you blind. Did your drinking imply consent?

No.

Yet a lot of people think it’s okay to enter a woman’s body when she hasn’t said she would like that.  Read the rest of this entry

Abuse evaporated my self-esteem 

You are good enough, even if you don't know it

You are good enough, even if you don’t know it

By Lily Mendez

I was the girl that everyone called a slut. Or that everyone thought would be pregnant by age 16.

That’s what I would say when people asked me what I was like, growing up. Obviously, I didn’t feel real good about myself.

And my low self-esteem was reflected in my relationships with boys.  Read the rest of this entry

Rape: Not as bad as seeming prejudiced

Children raped, trafficked

Children raped, trafficked

Around 1,400 children were beaten, raped, tortured and trafficked for over a decade in the lower-class town of Rotherham, in north England.

As authorities stood by. Or fined parents of the missing children for wasting their time.

Some of the girls were splattered with gasoline and told they’d be set afire if they reported the abuse. Some were forced to watch other kids being raped. Others were told that their parents or siblings would be killed or gang raped if they went to authorities, according to the New York Times.  Read the rest of this entry

Before Killing, Pistorius Resembled Abuser

Reeva Steenkamp, Oscar Pistorius

Reeva Steenkamp, Oscar Pistorius

South Africa’s Olympian sprinter, Oscar Pistorius, stands accused of murdering his girlfriend, model Reeva Steenkamp. She had locked herself in the bathroom of their apartment when he shot her. He claims he’d mistaken her for an intruder. A verdict is due next week.

I can’t say for sure that he’s a murderer, but abusive men are more likely than others to kill their mates. And he definitely sounds like an abuser, as suggested by text messages sent in the weeks before the killing.

The warning signs could caution others in similar circumstances. Read the rest of this entry

Yes Means Yes: There Oughta be a Law

Yes Means Yes

Yes Means Yes

Should “no means no” be upgraded to “yes means yes”?

The California Legislature says state-funded colleges should do just that when determining whether a complaint constitutes rape. By a 52-16 vote in the State Assembly and unanimously in the Senate.

Because:

  • Rape is rampant on college campuses, where 1/5 of women are assaulted
  • Rape charges on campus almost always involve alcohol
  • When people are drunk, they often can’t say anything

Read the rest of this entry

Shackling elephants is sad. Shackling women is hot.

The PETA ad below deplores cruelty to elephants.

Yet cruelty to women seems okay.

PETA: cruelty to women vs animals

PETA: cruelty to women vs animals

Animal cruelty depresses me and creates a lot of anxiety. So I’m with PETA on that.

But their advertising often troubles me.  Read the rest of this entry

Blaming Victims of the Powerful

There is no honor in killing innocent victims

There is no honor in killing innocent victims

Trigger Warning: May be triggering for rape victims

Ten-year-old “G” was attacked in a rape so violent that it made a hole between her vagina and rectum.

She bled so heavily that she nearly lost her life.

In the hospital, G’s mother and aunt fretted over community pressure to kill her to retain family honor.

Little G felt homesick at the hospital, but no one had the heart to tell her that her family was conspiring to kill her.  Read the rest of this entry

Must I Give Sex To Get Love?

The Pink Lady

The Pink Lady

By The Pink Lady @ Scratch Paper

Let’s talk about sex.

In all honesty it’s never been a very comfortable subject for me, and it’s taken a long time to figure out why. It wasn’t until my women’s studies class in college that the pieces started coming together, and I really started to figure out why I relate to sexuality the way that I do.

Trigger Warning: May be triggering for victims of sexual assault.

When I was younger (early teens) I was assaulted a number of times on my middle school campus, at my church, on various church events, and even in my own home by people who until these acts were committed I was pretty convinced were interested in me as a person.  Read the rest of this entry

Elliott Roger Blames Women For Patriarchy’s Problems

Elliot Roger

Elliot Roger

Women have control over which men get sex and which men don’t. Feminism is evil.

And so Elliot Roger blames women for his own problems — and for problems created by patriarchy — as he justifies his sad, horrifying, screwed up human hunting spree.

But then, if everyone else weren’t to blame, he would have to feel bad about himself.

Ironically, patriarchy — and not feminism — is the source of the particular problem he cites above.  Read the rest of this entry

Fantasizing About New Men

Walk a mile in her shoes

Walk a mile in her shoes

by  @ Ms Magazine

Dear Men:

Here is a new kind of fantasy. It is about a new kind of man.

These men are born on the campus of an Ivy League college in New England. Or at a West Coast university. Or maybe at a football-happy school on the Great Plains.

These men talk to each other. They order pizza, play fantasy football, share their feelings and do not make fun of each other for this. Mostly, they talk about the men who behave badly, who rape the women on campus, who threaten the women in online blog posts by creating a “rape guide” instructing other men how to rape specific women.

These New Men are, quite frankly, appalled. When the women activists on campus are shouting, demanding justice, they stand among them. They shout. They, too, demand justice.  Read the rest of this entry

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