Category Archives: sexism

Abuse evaporated my self-esteem 

You are good enough, even if you don't know it

You are good enough, even if you don’t know it

By Lily Mendez

I was the girl that everyone called a slut. Or that everyone thought would be pregnant by age 16.

That’s what I would say when people asked me what I was like, growing up. Obviously, I didn’t feel real good about myself.

And my low self-esteem was reflected in my relationships with boys.  Read the rest of this entry

The guy should always pay?

A young man and woman are out on a first date, and everything is going swimmingly. That is, until the check comes and the man’s card gets declined. With no cash and a bad credit card, what’s a guy to do?

Those words are from Tarnished Sophia, commenting on a scene from the ABC television show “What Would You Do?”

TS points out that the woman could have paid, or that people could have suggested that she pay. But no one does. She goes on:

But wait…it takes two to tango, and two people definitely ate the lunch and desert from this meal. Yet time after time the scenario runs it’s course without a single onlooker taking a moment to remind the gal that she has a wallet of her own. Instead, different men and couples voluntarily pay for this broke Romeo and his cheap Juliet. (Except for one segment, where no one offers to help, the woman leaves, and the man is left to wash dishes to pay off the meal.) Throughout the episode, female onlookers are heard to say that “this is his last date” and they “felt sorry for the girl”.

So what do I think?

The sort of sociology I do looks at how society gets in our heads — so much that no one feels like they have any choice outside of social scripts. That seems to be in play here. Read the rest of this entry

Rape: Not as bad as seeming prejudiced

Children raped, trafficked

Children raped, trafficked

Around 1,400 children were beaten, raped, tortured and trafficked for over a decade in the lower-class town of Rotherham, in north England.

As authorities stood by. Or fined parents of the missing children for wasting their time.

Some of the girls were splattered with gasoline and told they’d be set afire if they reported the abuse. Some were forced to watch other kids being raped. Others were told that their parents or siblings would be killed or gang raped if they went to authorities, according to the New York Times.  Read the rest of this entry

What If Men Menstruated?

A visit from Aunt Flo

A visit from Aunt Flo

Society has taught us that a girl on her period is weak, bitchy and occasionally psychotic… That time of the month is basically a pissed-off uterus.

Stacey, a student of mine, made that observation. She continued to talk about her shame-filled sister:  Read the rest of this entry

Nude Men Seem Less Intelligent

Justin Timberlake, showing some skin

Justin Timberlake, showing some skin

The more skin women reveal, the less men see them as intelligent or empowered.

Instead, nudity promotes the notion that women are sensitive, “feeling” creatures.

Turns out the perception runs both ways with women seeing men as less intelligent and less competent when they show skin, too. In fact, simply “taking off a sweater — or otherwise revealing flesh — can significantly change the way a mind is perceived” say researchers.

And as psychologist, Kurt Gray of the University of Maryland observed: Read the rest of this entry

Before Killing, Pistorius Resembled Abuser

Reeva Steenkamp, Oscar Pistorius

Reeva Steenkamp, Oscar Pistorius

South Africa’s Olympian sprinter, Oscar Pistorius, stands accused of murdering his girlfriend, model Reeva Steenkamp. She had locked herself in the bathroom of their apartment when he shot her. He claims he’d mistaken her for an intruder. A verdict is due next week.

I can’t say for sure that he’s a murderer, but abusive men are more likely than others to kill their mates. And he definitely sounds like an abuser, as suggested by text messages sent in the weeks before the killing.

The warning signs could caution others in similar circumstances. Read the rest of this entry

Yes Means Yes: There Oughta be a Law

Yes Means Yes

Yes Means Yes

Should “no means no” be upgraded to “yes means yes”?

The California Legislature says state-funded colleges should do just that when determining whether a complaint constitutes rape. By a 52-16 vote in the State Assembly and unanimously in the Senate.

Because:

  • Rape is rampant on college campuses, where 1/5 of women are assaulted
  • Rape charges on campus almost always involve alcohol
  • When people are drunk, they often can’t say anything

Read the rest of this entry

Shackling elephants is sad. Shackling women is hot.

The PETA ad below deplores cruelty to elephants.

Yet cruelty to women seems okay.

PETA: cruelty to women vs animals

PETA: cruelty to women vs animals

Animal cruelty depresses me and creates a lot of anxiety. So I’m with PETA on that.

But their advertising often troubles me.  Read the rest of this entry

Why Would Women Grumble and Tumble Over Feminism?

WTF? Women Against Feminism?

WTF? Women Against Feminism?

Women are still proclaiming they’re not feminists over at Tumblr.

Tumblr may be a new thing, but women fighting against their interests is not.

Now why is that?

Before looking at that question, let’s look at the trend:

Feminists whine about stupid stuff, like a right to their wages

Two centuries ago plenty of women shamed and shunned feminists who worked for the right to: vote, own property, have a right to their wages, not be beaten by husbands, get a divorce, have a right to their children after leaving an abusive spouse… and more.

Geez, no wonder feminists were snubbed! Totally unreasonable. Read the rest of this entry

His & Hers Objectification

Check out the side-by-side comparisons that show how strange it is when women and men get the same sex object treatment:

Women don’t seem to objectify men the way men do women.

It’s not that we’re any better. We just aren’t bombarded by a steady stream of sexualized and fetishized men and man-parts — that unconsciously seep into our brains. Thus, when men are turned into sex objects, it can look ridiculous.

But why’s objectification a problem? Read the rest of this entry

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