Category Archives: relationships
Just knowing that someone likes us spurs attraction to them.
In one experiment a young woman acted interested in men via eye contact, leaning toward them, and listening attentively. Afterward, the men said they liked her very much.
In fact, “liking” — or not — can be a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Misconceptions surround sexual repression. And both women and men can be confused.
Some women feel insulted if anyone suggests they might be repressed.
And conversations with guys have made me realize that plenty of them think that repression means, “I really want to have sex with you but I’m going to consciously repress the idea.”
Repression isn’t quite like that. Read the rest of this entry
A few weeks ago, a woman invited me to her apartment, then proceeded to interview me for the role of her boyfriend/
Since I write about polyamorous relationships and since I list myself as “in an open relationship” on Facebook, she figured I must be “available.”
Besides, I’m a guy; aren’t guys always ready for a willing woman?
In short: No. Read the rest of this entry
Men are more likely than women to separate love and sex, right?
Men are more interested in no-strings sex, and they are less likely to be distressed the next day.
A while back a New York Times piece advocating open relationships discussed how it’s typically easier for gay men, compared with straight or lesbian couples, to open their relationships — for that reason.
But is it true? Read the rest of this entry
The belief is so widespread that we needn’t say what the one thing is.
Yet the truism isn’t true.
You may have heard that since there are more women than men on college campuses these days, women are pressured to do sex the way men like it: No strings attached. Read the rest of this entry
When you think of red state sexuality, images of Bible believers saving themselves for marriage — or at least keeping their numbers down — may come to mind.
No wonder plenty of Southerners favor pastors and politicians who preach sex after marriage, abstinence education, no contraception, and shuttering Planned Parenthood.
And blue state sexuality? Full of “friends with benefits” and casual hookups, right? Read the rest of this entry
Originally posted on Scott Williams:
You understand how to fix your car. You can recite hockey stats like a scout. You understand renovations. You are good at your job. So why can’t you figure out a clitoris? The G-Spot? Do you really know if she’s faking it?
It is staggering the number of females in a longterm heterosexual marriage or relationship who tell me they rarely orgasm unless they do it themselves. The percentage is so high that I am nervous about how believable it would sound if I ventured a guess. The words, vast majority, have a truthful ring to them. Many women admit that they used to have more pleasure. Often women will tell me that their partner tries to pleasure them. More often than not, however, it’s tempting to just “lie back and dream of England”. So what is the big deal? Why is this so hard?
It really isn’t. It…
View original 476 more words
You can’t be autonomous and empowered if you are being run by sexual scripts.
Whether the script says everyone should be pure or the script says everyone should hookup.
Plenty of women worry that they will be punished for being sexual, “You slut, ho, skank…”
Even after marriage, the negativity won’t magically disappear. No wonder nearly half of American women have experienced sexual dysfunction.
The only message our moms or grandmas got, premaritally, was “sex is bad.” Today, messages are mixed. But can still be disempowering. Read the rest of this entry